Her Reason (On Hold)

Chapter twelve

Zoya's POV.

Your beauty is like a book, it can not be judged by its cover.

"All this happened while you were at school?" My mother angrily says, she was talking about the scratches, I don't know why all of a sudden she was carrying about what happened to me on an day to day basis because they basically forced me to be like a shadow in this house.

Although I wanted nothing else other then to be in my room sitting and reading, at the end of the day she was still my mother and I couldn't just ignore her and leave because I had to respect her.

"Thy Lord hath decreed that ye worship none but Him, and ye be kind to your parents, whether one or both of them attain old age in thy life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them but address them, in terms of honor.""  [17:23]

"See this is what I have said to you either be a shadow or take it of, you know that we are living in a western country and how they view women with scarfs" this was the difference between me and my parents, they care so much about what others say and act in certain ways that please those around them, that they end up forgetting to please the one that created them. Which in fact is the other way round and that our goal in life is to please Allah (SWT).

And among the people there is he who sells himself for the pleasure of Allah, and Allah is kind to His worshippers. [2:207]

"But no you do nothing other then be a burden to this family" once I heard her say those words my head shot quickly up so that I could look at her face and see if she meant it or not, however the moment my eyes made contact with hers I wish it didn't because I saw so much sincerity that it hurt me to think this is what my parents think of me, because if I didn't look at her face I could have said that she didn't mean it, but an eye can't replace what it had seen.

"I can't wait for the day you leave"hearing her say those harsh words it was like someone took a knife and was repeatedly stabbing my heart with it. It's not as if the thought of running away never crossed my mind, it's just there is always this one reason  that forces me to stay.

It was stated in a Hadith that the Prophet (S.A.W.) said, 'He who breaks off the ties of blood will not enter Paradise.' Which if you know me well you would know that all actions that are taken by me is to enter paradise.

"Which is why me and your father want you to get married, we have been thinking about this for a while but just haven't found a suitable person for you" seeing the sincerity in my mothers face and voice there was nothing I could say to make her change her mind, and especially if my father was involved in the conversation.

"Inn Sha Allah that will be quick" my mother says as she walks away from the kitchen and makes her way to the room where father was currently sleeping. I couldn't wait for him to see the marks on my face and hear this lecture all over again.

Slowly standing up of the chair I made my way up to my room and locked it behind me. Not bothering to take of my shoes or scarf I ran to my bed and fell face first on it as the first of many years made their way down my cheeks.

Why did my parents have to hate me so much, was it because I was mute? Or the fact that I still had my scarf on? I wasn't sure for how long i can handle third or how long I laid like that but all I know was that it didn't take me long from when I hit the bed for he tears to start making their way out.

I always hated my life and couldn't wait for this final year before I could finally go and work, so that I know where my life is heading. I have endured so many years of pain from the world around me so that I could graduate, but not for my parents to ruin my last year and lifestyle by putting me in an arranged marriage which might end up forcing me to not graduate was eating my heart away.

Feeling the phone in my pocket vibrate, I took it out of my pocket without having to get up from the position I was in, it was a text from my secret admirer.

If I was asked what you most resembled I would say a star, due to the way you both bring light to darkness.

Staring at the text for what felt like minutes, it was bonly a couple of seconds I felt a smile start to form on my face, however once I realise that this text wasn't going to change anything my frown made its way onto my face.

What do you want? I quickly sent it as I stared at the screen waiting for the secret admirers respond.

To fill your life with nothing but happiness.

Not wanting the text to disturb my emotions to much I quickly wrote something to make sure that every time I stared at that screen reality would hit me on the face.

Well I'm afraid to say that when my forced arrange marriage walks through my door happiness will immediately walk out.