The Bad and The Broken

Chapter 49

Then we moved here, Ryder started to pay all this attention to me, and now here I am: scared to take a hit.

That's what happened- someone is showing an interest in my well being and I'm trying to keep them from finding out the truth.

Speaking of Ryder, he showed up to his classes today, but is still avoiding me. I shouldn't mind, but I do.

My thoughts were interrupted by the bell signalling fourth period. I decided to skip this class, though.

I walk to the library, and go to a table in the very back corner, hidden by the book shelves.

I put my forehead on the cold table, letting out a sigh. It's really hot.

I relax into the uncomfortable chair, and close my eyes.

"Daddy can I have a cookie?" I ask, looking up at him.

"Of course you can, Raine Drop, you just have to bring me one too," he smiles.

I smile and run the the kitchen. I run back with two big chocolate chip cookies.

I climb into his lap and hand him his cookie. I lay my head on his chest and he rubbed circles on my back.

We crunch on the cookies and watch Looney Tunes, laughing when Bugs Bunny tricks Elmer Fud.

I jump when someone taps my shoulder, and look up at a giggling Jenny.

"Hey," she says when she stops her giggling.

She sits down in the seat across from me, then starts trying to talk to me.

"Didn't peg you as a girl to skip classes," she says, "you seem like a goodie goodie."

I roll my eyes.

She stares at me, and I stare back.

Why is she here? Why is she trying to talk to me?

Her happy face turns glum, and she looks away. I want to ask what's wrong, but I don't.

"I- um," she starts talking again, not looking at me, "I have to tell you something."

I furrow my brows and nod, telling her to go on. She sighs, then looks at me.

"Remember when you... when you talked to me in the restrooms?" She whispers.

I slowly nod.

"Well... TJ- he-" she looks away again, and takes a deep breath, "I told TJ," she slowly finishes.

I feel my eyes grow wide, but the rest of me doesn't move.

"He- I-" she face palms herself, "I was thinking about everything you told me, and was a little upset through the day, and he was tickling me and telling me to tell him and I just..." she trails off.

That's three people. Three people know.

I stop breathing as I think over and over again about how much I've screwed up.

I start to breath fast and feel my chest tighten.

I quickly get up and leave. She doesn't follow or call me, which I'm grateful for.

I need to be alone right now. I go to the nearest bathroom, and lock myself in a stall.

I pace back and forth in the small space I have.

It's okay, Dawn, it's okay. TJ obviously isn't going to tell anyone, it's been a while since that day.

At that thought, I calm down a little.