Fragments of the Heart

Of Dissapointing Epiphanies

Fragments of the Heart

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© DaniyahA

F R A G M E N T - 82

Of Disappointing Epiphanies

I cannot imagine
how only yesterday
I fell in love with you.
I fell in love with
every aspect I
thought was you:
actions you didn't do,
words you didn't say,
beliefs you didn't have.

My heart grew bigger
with every glance you
threw my way,
every 'how are you'
you recited religiously
on Tuesday mornings,
every smile you
gifted me with
utter ease.

My heart kept growing
for a man I thought
was you.
Oh how my heart was a fool
and my brain a mess
and my soul misguided.
Why have I brought
this silent misery
into my life?

I long for heartbreak
that is louder
than a thunderstorm.
I long for heartbreak
that is sharper
than a dagger.
I long for heartbreak
that is more vicious
than a Great White Shark.
I long for a heartbreak
that isn't as worse as
silent oblivion.

How disappointing it is
to assume that a boy
is more that just a boy.
How disappointing it is
to fall in love with
an idea that is simply fiction.
How disappointing it is
to realize that everyone
is not who they appear to be.

Never in my life
would I have pictured myself
holding onto the idea of you.
Never in my life
would I have imagined myself
still holding on after the epiphanies.
Never in my life
would I have imagined myself
crying hysterically over permanent realities.

I do not crave
a peace of mind
but rather an ease of heart.
I do not crave
a painted portrait
but rather the person in flesh.
I do not crave
a temporary illusion
but a long lasting reality.

Gone are thoughts
of you and me,
the infinities.
Gone are daydreams
of you and I,
the riptides.
Gone are longings
of us,
this unrealistic fuss.