Wowie I have anxiety(does that rhyme? Idk)

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So hi this is probs gonna be kind of like a diary bc I need to vent on someone but all of my friends already have enough problems and I can't hinder them like that. Even though like no one will read this it'll help me feel more like I'm expressing myself, in a way of that makes sense. So anyway onto what's going on in my life right now:

A couple of days ago my doctor diagnosed me with anxiety. I had already known I probably had some form of it. And I know this starts my book off kind of heavier and I'm sorry. Right now my anxiety seems to be driving me insane. I don't even know what I'm afraid or anxious about, I'm just anxious.

There seems to be so much drama and stuff in my life right now. I'm going to be a high schooler next year and half of my friend group (my main mental support) will be leaving. One is going to be homeschooled, another is moving, and I just feel like there are a couple that will drift away because those main people they were really friends with will be gone.

I also have severe anxiety about picking a collage, it's just absolutely terrifying to me.

I also get anxious when texting people because I can't see the reaction on their face to tell what they're really feeling and I've been doing a lot of texting today and I seem to have a voice in the back of my head saying 'they think your so stupid and annoying and overbearing.' And I keep thinking 'no your being normal it's fine.' But I can't convince myself and even though in this situation I would draw, write poetry, play on my phone, read fanfic, or watch anime in this situation none of them are helping.

I know I'll wake up tomorrow and everything will be fine but that's only if I can actually sleep tonight and if I can't I'll probably get back on here and post something else if I can. I don't even know if anyone will read this. If you do, please don't judge me.

So anyway I hope your having a lovely evening and that you sleep well tonight.

Hugs and kisses to all, and goodnight
~Elena

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