ANXIETY (𝘫𝘰𝘩𝘯𝘯𝘺𝘣𝘰𝘺)

Chapter 13

Status: edited

Pony's P.o.V.

"You'll never guess what Johnny did!"

I whisper yelled excitedly to Jeffy.

"What?" He laughed lightly.

"Remember my notes? Read the new one!"

Quickly, I pulled out all of the notes and showed him my newest one. Back at the hospital, I told him all about the notes and all about my crush on Johnny.

He wanted us to get together so bad it hurt.

Once he read through the first words and let the information process in his mind, he gasped loudly. "What did you say?"

My smile melted away and I let my shoulders fall. "Holy shit Jeffy! I never answered him! Right as I was about to you came, and I kinda forgot."

Oh my God. I couldn't even imagine how Johnny must feel right now.

"You're kidding? Ponyboy, he's probably devastated!" Jeffy yelled.

I nodded. "I know! Okay...I'll just answer him now. Unless that will make you feel awkward..."

He shook his head. "I have leave soon anyway, I was just about to tell you."

I frowned and we both stood up. "Oh, okay. It was real nice seeing you again Jeffy."

He smiled at me. "Yeah, I missed you those few days."

We walked downstairs, and I suddenly realized that I had left Johnny alone. I groaned and face palmed. "I'm the worst friend ever."

Jeffy put a hand on my shoulder. "It's okay, he'll understand."

"I hope so." I mumbled.

We walked to the door and he stood by it, fidgeting around. He seemed nervous for some reason. "Ponyboy...I know that you're in love with Johnny, and that makes me really happy because he loves you back. But, I'm..." he sighed. "I'm in love with you, and was kinda wondering if I could sort of...maybe...kiss you?"

I was shocked. Jeffy? In love with me? "I...I..." were the only words that would come out of my mouth.

"I know it won't mean anything to you, and I'm okay with that. I just want to see what it would feel like before you and Johnny are official."

I was silent for a few more seconds before finally making up my mind. "Alright." I heard myself say.

He seemed a bit surprised, but soon he slowly cupped my cheek and leaned in. "Are you sure?" He whispered.

I nodded, not knowing what else to do.

Slowly, he pressed his lips against mine. I kissed him back, just to make him feel good, but I didn't feel anything at all. Jeffy was my close friend, and I loved him more than anything. But I could never love him like that.

He pulled away with our foreheads still touching, and smiled some. "Thank you." He whispered and pressed another light kiss onto my lips before pulling back all the way. "I know you didn't like it, but it still means a lot that you would do this for me."