Eagle (A Loki love story)

Chapter 59

As it happened, I wished I had flown back to Jane's apartment by myself.  The car ride was absolutely terrible, not only did I have to be in close vicinity to a man who hated my husband but I was also sitting right next to a new couple.  A new couple who had no respect for what I was going through and were constantly kissing or whispering or giggling.  And it wasn't like I could turn away, look out the window, and cry.  Oh no.  The scientific devices just had to lay across all of our laps, making it seem like a roller coaster ride of horror.  It took us more than an hour and a half to get back to Jane's place because of the traffic and overall damage caused by the battle and Jane's air conditioner was broken.  By the time we actually got back, my back was aching from the dagger slash combined with the bad seatback and my effort to hold my wings in.
I barely made it back to Jane's apartment.  In fact, I collapsed against the wall of the elevator on the way up, unable to hold my wings in with the physical stress of the battle catching up with me. That coupled with the fact that I hadn't eaten a decent meal in....I couldn't remember how long.  I thought back to yesterday.  Thor had been so insistent that we leave, we hadn't had the chance to eat and the day went downhill from there.  The day before, I hadn't had dinner because I was with Loki but I had had breakfast and lunch.  At least, half a meal each time.
"Jane?" I muttered once we got into the apartment and I flopped down on the sofa.
"Yes?"
"Do you have anything I can eat?"

Loki's POV
News of Thor's return to Asgard spread so quickly, I knew he was back before he reached the throne room.  Quickly, I put on my disguise as Odin and took my rightful place on the throne as I waited for the oaf to come to me.
I was right, within an hour of his return, Thor was at the foot of my throne.
"Before you reprimand me, father, Mira has asked a favor of me and I would like to carry it out before I am punished."
"And what sort of favor did she ask of you?"
"It was a rather odd request, she wish to take possession of the books located in the alcove within the library."
"Ah.  Those books.  Very well, I will have them retrieved.  And what of Mira herself?  Does she ever plan to return here?"
"No.  She claimed that after...certain events....that she could not bear to return.  Father...you should know–"
"I am well aware of what transpired on Svartalfheim.  A soldier found his body.  Now that is all I wish to say on the matter.  You're dismissed." He opened his mouth to say something more but decided to not go against my command–for once–and left the hall.

Mira's POV
I nearly cleaned out Jane's fridge getting my strength back but not long afterwards, I fell asleep.  I don't remember much of what happened the next day.  When the sun was up, it seemed to go on forever but once it set, it seemed like the day had flown by.  It wasn't until dinner that night when Jane finally decided to strike up a conversation.
"Mira..." She wasn't sure if it was ok to talk with me.  Any sort of reminder of Loki brought on a crying fit that left me crabby and sleepy afterwards.
"What."
"I know you may not want to talk about this, but where are you going to go after Thor gets back?  My job moves me constantly and I don't think you want to follow me around for the rest of your life."
"SHIELD has undoubtedly figured out that I'm back on Earth now are probably moving to recover me.  I know they keep tabs on you too, especially after...." I looked over at Selvig, who didn't seem to be listening in on our conversation.  Jane followed my gaze and silently nodded.
"So are you saying that I should be expecting a visit from that Cole guy soon?" There was a knock on the door.
"Not Coulson." I sniffled, "Loki killed him." I curled up on the sofa again and pulled a blanket over my head.  I felt so ashamed now.  He had killed someone in front of me right before kidnapping me and somehow I had still fallen in love with him.  Where would we be now if I hadn't?  Would he be dead?  In prison?  Would Loki still be alive if I hadn't fallen in love with him?  And where would I be?  Probably still at SHIELD.  Completely oblivious to him.  Jane's door creaked open.
"Hello?"
"Is Eagle here?" It was a woman speaking.  But it wasn't Hill, this woman's voice was a deeper alto.
"Who?"
"The seventh Avenger.  We know you're harboring her."
"You speak as if she were a criminal."
"Thankfully not but I have been dealing with so many criminals these days that the language is second nature."
"What do you want from her?  Who are you?"
"Agent Melinda May.  I'm from SHIELD.  Once footage of the battle here reached our headquarters, we recovered her personal effects from the home in Wyoming." I zoned out after that, my heart clenching painfully and my face contorting as I struggled to keep quiet, not bothering to stop the tears streaming down my face, staining the white blanket.
"You don't intend to take her anywhere?"
"If she wants, she may stay with you.  I am just here to escort her wherever she desires to go, if she wishes to remain here on Earth.  I have also been instructed to question her about her counterpart, Loki." That did it.  Hearing his name spoken by someone else and with such disdain in their tone.  An ugly sob escaped my lips.
"Look, there's something I need to talk to you about before you can see her."
"No." I sat up, the same anger from two nights ago returning strong, "I'm not a baby."  Now that I could see the woman, I saw that she was a short, thin Asian woman with straight, shoulder length black hair and was dress in black leather clothing, all labeled with the SHIELD emblem, "Loki was killed in a world of ash.  He sacrificed his own life to save Thor, one of your oh-so-precious Avengers.  And he did it in front of me, his wife of two days and possible mother of his unborn child.  So you tell me, Melinda May, do you still think he's a heartless criminal?" She opened her mouth but I cut her off.
"And you know what the worst part is?  We were forced to leave his body there.  I couldn't take it with me.  He'll never get a proper burial and I'll never get to say goodbye." My voice choked up, preventing me from saying anything more, so I vaulted over the back of the sofa and stomped off to my room, dragging the blanket behind me and grabbing my bag of belongings from the shocked agent along the way.
Not moments after I slammed and locked my door did someone try to open it.  Only then did they knock.
"Look, Agent Brooks–"
"Not Brooks!  I'm married now!  Married and widowed!"
"Then Agent...." She trailed off when she realized she didn't know my last name anymore.
"Laufeyson." I heard Selvig tell her, "That was the equivalent of his last name and it is the name she would have taken."
"HAVE TAKEN!" I corrected.
"Alright.  Agent Laufeyson, I will stay here until Thor returns from Asgard should he return within the week.  Then I will take you wherever you decide to go." If I decided to go anywhere.

Loki's POV
Mira was quickly sinking into a depression and there was nothing I could do to stop it.  Thor planned to depart this morning and all that was left for me to do would be to give him the sedir books.  Part of me didn't want to give them to him at all, that would force Mira to come to Asgard and get them herself, so I could reveal that I still lived.  But I couldn't risk leaving Asgard and letting the whole of the Nine Realms know that Loki Laufeyson was pretending to be their king.  That is something that no Angel could save me from.  But I had to contact her somehow, give her some sort of hope that I was alive.  And if she planned to teach herself sedir without a proper instructor....my eyes turned to the books.  Perhaps....but then what would my excuse be?  Oh...there was always that....perfect.

After completing my task, I packed the books into a sack for Mira and sent a maid off to deliver it to Thor, as well as instructions to meet me in the throne room.  As soon as he arrived, I stood and began the conversation with something I had found in Odin's memory.
"You once said that there would never be a wiser king than me.  You were wrong.  The alignment has brought all the realms together.  Every one of them saw you offer your life to save them.  What can Asgard offer its new king in return?"
"My life.  Father, I cannot be king of Asgard.  I will protect Asgard and all the realms with my last and every breath but I cannot do so from that chair.  Loki, for all his grave imbalance, understood rule as I know I never will.  The brutality, the sacrifice–it changes you.  I'd rather be a good man than a great king."
"Is this my son I hear, or the woman he loves?"
"When I speak to you, I always hear mother's voice.  This is not for Jane, father.  She does not know what I came here to say.  Now forbid me to see her or say she can rule at my side, it changes nothing." I sat down.  Obviously, this conversation was going to be longer than I had thought.  Wonderful.
"One son who wanted the throne too much and another who will not take it.  Is this my legacy?"
"Loki died with honor.  I shall try to live the same, is that not legacy enough?" I stopped a moment to ponder how Odin would have replied.  However, before I could say anything, Thor looked down and offered his oh-so-precious hammer back to me.
"It belongs to you–if you are worthy of it." I was desperate to take it away but I knew that I would never be able to lift it and that would shatter my illusion.
"I shall try to be."
"I cannot give you my blessing, nor can I wish you good fortune."
"I know." He replied sadly as he picked up the books and turned to go.  But I stopped him.
"If I were proud of the man my son had become, even that I could not say, it would speak only from my heart.  Go, my son."
"Thank you, father." He departed from the hall, without the usual thunder in his step.  I waited until he was out of earshot and wasn't going to turn back and say anything to drop my illusion.
"No.  Thank you." I grinned.  If I fooled Thor, the rest of Asgard would soon follow.