Burgundy Is The New Sexy

||Chapter 35||

I nibbled on a piece of toast as I sat watching dad talk to Nya. We were the only ones up this early, no one else wakes up at 6' in the morning. That was like a sin to them. Unless they had work. Especially Nate.

None the less us being the only ones in the kitchen didn't stop her from being completely embarrassed. Her face and neck were a deep shade of red and I think she was about to cry.

"Dad I'm sorry I betrayed you like that. I didn't mean to." She said in a choked tone. Yup, it's official. She was on the verge of crying. I somewhat felt sorry for her, because just the thought of dad being slightly offended or hurt as a result of something that I said or did, made me want to bawl my eyes out and wallow in self pity. I'm sure I would somehow end up begging at his feet for forgiveness.

"I can't believe you said that. Do you know what it feels like to be taken advantage of? No! You don't." She jumped as a few tears escaped her eyes. I looked away. I really didn't know how to describe the strange feeling that suddenly took over my body when I saw her crying. Was it pity? Was it me still having a tiny soft spot for her in my heart? No, it couldn't be. It must have been pity. Yeah, I feel sorry for her, and that's that.

"D-dad please, I don't want to lose the bond we have." She begged taking a step towards him. She stopped when he held up his hand. It's like her whole world broke during that one gesture. I breathed deeply. So much pain and regrt in the air, it was suffocating.

"Nya-K Suano to say the least I'm disappointed with you and you sister." I looked up to see both of their eyes on me. "Kadymaiyen, I'm disappointed in you for fighting your little sister. You are suppose to be setting an example, and I know that you were angry, well is still angry at what she said. Trust me I am too. But you should have come to me. Not fight her." I nodded.

He was actually right. Most of the things Nya did or say were to get under my skin. The fact that I reacted in such a way was probably somewhat satisfying to her and this might be one argument that she will not let me live down. Ofcourse I was hurt that Grey did that to me. Which female wouldn't be hurt that their ex-boyfriend who they had trust tried to take advantage of them? No woman in her right mind ofcourse. I trusted him. I thought that he was different from every other man. Yes, I do realize that the split had cut him deep, but I didn't know it was that deep. I didn't even know he loved me that much. I guess the saying is true, you don't appreciate something until you lose it.

I was the big sister. I was suppose to be the bigger person and show that what she said didn't hurt me. Even though it did. I was suppose to be strong and not let her get through my walls. Now, she knows how to get to me. And I'm sure that if she does it again I will react in the same way. Unless I've gotten over it, but I know I won't for now.

"Kadymaiyen!" I jumped up. They both were glaring at me. I went slightly red. "Yes dad?"

"Nya has something to say." He gestured for her to go on. She gulped before starting.

"I-I'm sorry for what I said. I really didn't mean it and I hope you find it in your heart to forgive me." I nodded studying her facial expression. I wanted to see if she meant it or not. I didn't find any sign of dishonesty, maybe she really meant it. I nearly laughed. Maybe she doesn't. I've known Nya long enough to know how she operates.

"Hmmm, yeah." Dad glared. "I'm sorry too. I do apologize for doing your face like that, but, I won't apologize for how I reacted." My father sighed. Nya gave me a confused look.

"I won't apologize for the way I reacted. I have all the right to react in such a way. You don't know how scared I was when he came on to me. You can't even fathom the hurt, rage and shock that ran through my body. You know why? Because you have never been in a situation like that before. It is haunting and depressing. I would never want my worst enemy to go through something like that. And for you to say that to me made me even angrier. How dare you say that! To go as far as to wish death upon someone who has just been sexually assaulted. Have you ever experienced that state of mind a person goes through after they have been sexually assaulted? No! So I really don't understand how someone who does not know jack shit about my situation wish for it to get worse! That's why I reacted in such a way." I stopped to breath before I continued. "Trust me, looking at it now I should have never gave you the satisfaction to see me break. I was suppose to let you walk away feeling like a fool as I bottled up the hurt that overtook my body. But I couldn't, there is so much a person can take before they break and that was the last straw for you. I was going to beat your face in before choking you to death. I see now that that was a foolish action to take. I am the bigger person here, and I should have let you be and not yield to the urge of fighting with a foolish little girl. A little girl that preys on others to feel good about herself. Maybe it's only me, but still. I'm done with your little childish games. I really don't know why you hate me, and I've given up on wanting to know why. So little sister I am sorry for doing your face and neck like that, but I am not sorry for the way I reacted." I finished getting up. Everyone stood at the entrance with shocked expressions. I ignored them, and as if I forgot something, I spun around to face my father.