Please Don't Hunt Me Down, Brother (Sabriel/Destiel)

Chapter 9: All My Fault.

-- Castiel --

Castiel couldn't believe it.

Ellen and Jo Harvelle were dead.

And- as he sat there in the kitchen, still holding Dean's hands, and staring at the floor- he realised-

This is all my fault.
I should've gone with them- I should've died instead of them. They went out there for me, and they didn't come back. This is all my fault.

Castiel didn't know when he'd started sobbing, but now he felt the full force of the tremors running through his body. Dean let go of his hands- but only to grip Castiel's shoulders and pull him towards him, into a tight embrace. Castiel squeezed his eyes shut, trying to hold back from crying, but he couldn't.

Somehow, through the tears, Castiel managed to choke out, "I'm sorry."

"Hey, Cas. It's not your fault." Dean tried to reassure the trembling boy he held in his arms, and all Castiel could think of was Chuck holding him while he cried when his parents had been killed- but he knew his parents' deaths weren't his fault. "It's not your fault, Cas, alright?"

Castiel pulled himself from Dean's gentle arms, and stared at him. "It is my fault, Dean! It's all my fault! Ellen and Jo went after those vampires because of me, and because of me, they never returned!" Castiel's voice had risen from the first word, and he was shouting at Dean now, his voice shaking badly, tears pouring, crying as much as he had when his parents had been slaughtered.

Something flashed across Dean's expression- hurt, Castiel thought, and Castiel drew in a shuddering breath. He stood up, and tried not to look at any of the other hunters in the room, as he stormed to his bedroom. He looked back only once, at Dean, to see the young man he had developed such passionate feelings for, who was looking right back at him, with an expression that said I'm sorry, Cas.

Castiel closed his door gently, not bothering to lock it, and after closing the windows and curtains, he lay down on his bed, staring at the wall, and felt himself sink inside himself, into the roiling darkness that had always held residence in the deepest pits of his chest, that he'd never tried to venture into, as if he knew he'd never be able to get out.

-- Sam --

Sam watched as Castiel stormed to his bedroom after learning that the vampires who'd killed his family had also killed Ellen and Jo- and watched his brother's face as Castiel walked away from him. Dean had held Castiel tight while he'd wept, and only Sam had seen the look of love on Dean's face as the boy cried.

Dean slumped back in his chair, his chin resting on his chest, closing his eyes. Sam looked up, around at the other hunters in the room, and the momentary silence was broken.

Chuck cleared his throat.

He opened his mouth to speak, but then closed it again.

"I-" He started to speak, but then quieted, sinking down onto a chair.

Amara placed a hand on her brother's shoulder, and through the tears that stained her cheeks, she said, her own voice wobbling, "We should go back to the barn, to retrieve Ellen and Jo's bodies. They need a hunter's funeral."

Chuck looked up at her, and some communication passed between them in a look that Sam couldn't decipher, and he stood again. Sam watched as Chuck and Amara left, followed by Raphael.

Michael remained in the kitchen, leaning against the counter.

"Damn." he muttered. "The Harvelles were the best hunters I knew outside of our family. Bill Harvelle, Ellen's husband, was one of the best, before he died on a hunt- with your father, I believe- John Winchester."