[1] sad but true. james hetfield, metallica

thirty.

Jason was sitting down with his bass, playing. He sounded great!
He looked up and smiled at me. I waved and smiled back.

"Okay, well, play with us?" Kirk looked at James and raised an eyebrow. James barely said anything, just a simple, "sure."

James watched Jason play his bass, very carefully. He grabbed his own guitar that was hanging up and walked back over to where he was standing. I sat, criss cross, on a chair by the steps so I could see all of them play. This is the first time I've heard them all play together, I was actually excited!

Lars sat at his drum set, Kirk picked up his guitar, and James stood at the mic they had set up. Jason stood near Kirk and just smiled. He seemed happy to be there.

"What do you all want to play?" Kirk asked, looking to all of them. They all shrugged.

"Hey, did you guys ever write anything?" I spoke up, looking over at James.

"Well yeah. But uh..Jason doesn't know them.." James answered.

"He could just listen to a bit of the song and then chime in, yeah? I mean he picks up well!" Lars grinned, Jason still smiling.

"Uhm..okay...Seek And Destroy?" James raised an eyebrow, looking at Lars.

"Sure!" Lars beamed. And they began to play.

As they played, I was totally mesmerized by James. His whole persona changed as soon as he began to sing! He seemed happy and lost in the music, and his voice was so unique and special, I loved it! The way he effortlessly played his guitar, never making a mistake and still being able to keep his energy with all the headbanging—and there was a lot of that! It really fuckin' impressed me!

You can tell the music really helps him. I could tell how upset he looked before, and now he seems better. But I also could tell he was still holding something back..

I mean, I don't know how well Cliff played, but Jason honestly sounded really good with them..

Kirk and Lars were great too! Kirk is an amazing guitar player, and Lars' energy while he's beating those drums was awesome!

After they finished James immediately looked at me, he looked worried. What..Does he think I didn't like it?

"James, babe, that was awesome!" I giggled, hopping off the chair and walking over to him. He looked relieved and half smiled, grabbing my hand. I stood on the tips of my toes to kiss him because he was standing straight up. Ugh I'm too short. He chuckled and kissed me back.

"Jason, man, you sounded great!" Lars yelled, making James look over at them..

I think I can kinda understand more why James feels this way towards Jason. When he lost his mom, he had music. And when he played with his best friends, especially Cliff, he was able to let all his emotions out through the music. And then he lost Cliff. I was told, by Kirk, he refused to even pick up his guitar for a little while after Cliff died. I guess, now he just realises that Cliff's really gone. He lost the guy that was there for him when he went through his mom's death.

Maybe he just doesn't want someone coming in, that he doesn't know and doesn't understand about his mom, to just come in, and in James' words, replace Cliff.