Journal Of a Pessimist

Entry Nine [Place]

Entry Nine:

Journal of Lisa

Place: Entry IX

February 24th, 2016, 13:34

I think it's odd how everyone has a special place that makes them feel at home, welcomed, at peace. All I can wonder is why? Why does being in a different place have any effect on your well-being, or alter your personality to a degree that you can be either enraged or completely relaxed?

Personally I could never quite grasp the concept of a 'safe place', it all seems a bit clichéd but not actually truthful; I mean, I'm the same no matter where I lay, be it in my own bedroom, in my school classrooms or in the store, I'm always the same person.

That may not exactly be a good thing considering that I wouldn't call myself a specifically good person and a change might not be quite such a bad thing, however, I can't say that I've ever been ever slightly remodelled because of a change of scenery.

But then again, isn't that why most people move houses? Move towns? Countries even?

Other than obvious reasons such as money, work and education, people commonly move or 'emigrate' to reinvent themselves. People want to forget their pasts and turn over a new leaf- and trust me if anyone understands the want to start again, the lust of a new life, it's me; I have wished that I could redo all of my mistakes and pretend to be a shallow and common person since the very beginning but I know I can't.

God...I mean, why do you think I'm depressed, a pessimist? I just want to redo what I can. I've heard so many people say 'I f I had the option to go back nd change my mistakes, I wouldn't because they've made me who I am' I can't help but feel disgusted.

If you had this once in a lifetime, amazing opportunity, you'd be a fool to not try. It's literally something I have obsessed over- you know I wouldn't lie to you. I have thought over and over about certain little instances where I know I slipped up, where I know I said the wrong thing and I could have done something to prevent it but I didn't realise at the time that what I was saying would make me seem odd.

Reality is stupid, we all love those life quotes about how mistakes make us who we are but the sucky reality is that we all hate those quotes deep down; we hate that people can write them and pretend they are happy and truly wouldn't change a thing. It's obvious that we all have something in our past that haunts us, that leaves us waking up in the night in a sweat about something that happened years ago but is killing us on the inside.

I never knew just quite how unfair the world was until I sat down and actually thought about it, long and hard, and I realised that we are all complete idiots. It was hard admitting the truth, but hardship is all that humanity is about.

For once, I'm giving you an assignment because I'm here writing, hoping dearly that one of you has a brain. I'm asking you to comment about an instance that you wish you could go back and redo- it can be stupid, funny or difficult but still tell me, because I can't deal with this world alone anymore.

Bye, and do your damn homework:

Love, Lisa

Journal of Lisa

Place: Entry IX

February 24th, 2016, 15:47

Entry Nine: complete

A/N

Hey, guys! What do you think? You already know what I'm going to ask, so I'll do it as soon as possible so I can get it out of the way...comment, comment, comment if you liked it!

also, I would actually really enjoy it if you guys did Lisa's homework because not only would it provide a great source of entertainment for little old me but I think it would be cool for you guys to read each other's stories about funny mistakes we wish we'd never made.

At the minute I'm embarrassed to say I can't actually think of a story to tell you guys- I'm claiming that I'm all writed out (not a word...) but I promise that as soon as I come up with a story I will post it ij the comment section along with whatever you guys have written, won't that be some craic?

I'm sorry it's been a while since I've updated, I'll be back on my usual update cycle starting now, I know it's odd but I'm generally busier on breaks than during school weeks so I have been extremely busy this Easter!

Anywho...that's all for the minute so byee guys!

Author out:

Love, LostInCake