The Beta

XX

*Rian*

The intoxicating high I was on kept me so occupied that I forgot I was supposed to be grounded. Until I walked through the front door and conveniently remembered. I locked the door behind me and closed my eyes, trying to locate Thea's whereabouts through sound. Her heartbeat wasn't to be found. She wasn't home yet? She should've gotten off work an hour ago.

While I debated what to do, I scavenged the fridge for something to eat. Most of the food was leftovers, so I opted for cold pizza. I bit off the end and hungrily swallowed it. Had Faye been hungry when I left her? I should've bought her dinner. I cursed myself for being so careless.

Thea's car rolled into the drive a moment later, its engine roaring in my ears. I stuffed the ziploc bag of pizza back into the fridge and leaned against the counter to wait for her. She took five seconds longer than normal to reach the front door. Her heels clicked against the tile floor while she headed directly to her bedroom.

No greeting? No checking to see if I broke the rules? Something was up.

I finished off the rest of the pizza in three bites and then walked over to her door. My knuckles rapped gently on the wood.

"Thea?" I called. "Are you alright?"

A sniffle reached my ears. I stiffened. Was she crying? Maybe I misheard her.

"Y-yeah," she stammered. "I'm okay."

That was not the sound of an okay woman. My temper spiked, so I barged through the door. Thea was lying on her bed, staring at the ceiling. Her cheeks were smudged with watery black streaks. She looked like crap.

"What's wrong?" My voice had softened, not wanting to worsen the situation with a sharp attitude.

"Nothing. It's..." She took a deep breath. "It's nothing."

"Don't lie to me."

"Rian, I just need a few hours alone."

I sat down on the edge of the bed. "Is it work?"

"No!" she hissed, eyes narrowing on me. "Stop asking so many questions! Go away."

"Thea, I just—"

"I don't want to talk about it. Leave me alone."

Sighing, I got up and left. This was why women made me edgy. They were so emotional and inconsistent. Thankfully, Thea hadn't been born a wolf. It would be a lot worse if she had been.

Just as I settled onto the leather sofa, my phone rang in my pocket. My heart skipped as I wondered if it was Faye. The caller identification proved otherwise. Unknown number?

"Hello?" I answered suspiciously, pressing the glass surface against my ear.

"Rian," greeted a stern voice.

My body trembled from the automatic impulse to obey. I took a deep breath. "Rosco? Why are you calling me from an unknown number?"

"Because you wouldn't answer otherwise."

Well, that was probably true. I knew he could manipulate me to nearly do whatever he wanted. Including returning to Oregon to begin Alpha training.

"I'm assuming Michael called you," I said.

"Yes. He disclosed your plan to reject Alphahood."

"That's...right."

"You know we cannot allow you to follow through with that. It will impact the natural order. Your decisions affect the entire pack. You should know that better than anyone."

I winced. "It's because I understand that I left Oregon in the first place."

"And your time to return has come. We are not meant to live human lives forever, Rian."

"I'm not saying that, but I haven't gained any control over my transitions yet. I'm still working on my temper."

"We can further that in your Alpha training, but you need to come home now."

For the first time, I noticed the urgency in his voice. The most patient man I knew sounded rushed. To say it was unlike him didn't begin to cover it.

"What's wrong?" I questioned slowly, cautious.

He sighed. "My prognosis has been shortened. They think I have only a few weeks to live."

I wallowed in guilt. Rosco was dying sooner than he'd expected. That meant the time he had to train the next Alpha was severely limited. If I rejected the title, he would have to find a replacement and train them in what little time remained.

"Rian," he told me, "I know this is a strange position to be in. No one would have expected nature to choose you as Alpha. Nevertheless, this is the way it's supposed to be."

"It feels wrong. I'll ruin the pack if I become Alpha." The anguish of those words hit me hard. "Rejecting Alpha is in everyone's best interest."

"No, no, no. You only see what you want to see. Clearly, you are gifted if nature chose you."

I stood up from the couch, overcome with abrupt anger. "Maybe nature is wrong this time. I am not fit for Alpha and I want nothing more than to stay away from the pack."

That was a flat lie. I missed the pack a lot. They were my only companions, my most trusted friends. Faye and Thea were all I had here, but they couldn't fill the void for camaraderie that I craved. Not even an anima could do that.

"How do you intend on breaking the bond, Rian?" my Alpha inquired knowingly. "You and I know there is only one way to do it, and you can't. Only the evil can do it."

"It wouldn't be the first time I've shed blood." Yet I knew it was different than those times before. Killing our enemies came naturally, like second instinct. This would be anything but natural.

"Taking the life of an enemy is different than taking the life of a brother."

That sentence bounced around in my skull for hours after the call ended. Rosco was right—I couldn't kill a wolf from our pack. Every instinct and value embedded within me would fight it, because if I hurt a brother, I hurt the pack. And if I hurt the pack, then I would hurt myself. We were all connected.

So then how would I take on this new life? How could I cure my recklessness if I indulged in my wolf side even more? Doing so would make it worse.
And what about Faye? The very thought of leaving without her burned a hole through my chest. I couldn't leave her, but she wasn't ready for the truth. Even if she did accept it easily, I would be ripping her away from the normal life she was building.

I pushed my face into my hands. Tomorrow I would decide what to do. I would set my emotions aside and look at this from an objective perspective. Whether I liked it or not, I would be returning to Oregon soon—either for Alpha training or for Rosco's death—and it would be better if I picked the reason for myself.