Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Some people say social media is all fake; that it's all built on constructed truths people tell about themselves. With a filter, people are able to make themselves look better, happier, prettier or funnier.
I don't think of it like that. I see social media profiles as a way of finding out the truth about people. Instagram aesthetics can tell a lot about who a person thinks they are, or who they wish they were. To me, it doesn't get truer than that.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Chris' Insta aesthetic is. . . stereotypical fuckboy. Posing while smoking, moody selfies, partying and beers with the guys. It doesn't surprise me. In fact, it's just what I expected. At the same time, I'm a little bit disappointed that I haven't been proven wrong.
He is even more of a douchebag online than in person. That's my friend counter going back to absolute zero.
The only person who's even said a word to me is part of the crowd I'm meant to be staying away from. By the looks of it, he's trouble. It might not seem it, but I don't look for trouble; trouble always finds me.
Brilliant.
I keep scrolling. Then, my finger accidentally taps twice on one of the pictures. The heart attack following my mistake is insane. I can practically feel my heart stop and reboot itself again.
Oh shit. I've liked a picture from months ago. He's gonna think I'm interested in him. He's gonna think I'm some obsessive first year who goes through his profile late at night to look at his face before I sleep. So fucking creepy.
My social life is ruined.
If I unlike it, he might notice. Should l just act cool about it? After all, he's the only one who's been nice to me at school. Friends like friends' pictures. Nothing wrong with that.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
A stalker? Hardly.
I try to think of a good reply. If anyone is a stalker it's him, finding my profile two seconds after he met me.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
There's a knock on my bedroom door. The sound startles me, and I almost end up throwing my phone across the room. Then, I realise it's just mum. She's back from work.
"How was school?" she asks.
I get a lonely, sad flashback of the moment I had lunch on my own. Shrugging, I give her my best attempt at a smile. "Good."
"Did you make any friends?"
"Not yet," I say.
Mum gives me a sad look. If only she knew that I'm friendless because of her. I'm choosing to be a loner because of last year.
I'm not a complete loser. I know how to make friends.
The easiest way is to find the smoking area, hand someone a lighter, and you're set. Or go to a party and share a can of cider with someone who looks lonely. They'll most likely start spilling their guts about why they're upset, and then thank you for listening. Alternatively, compliment drunk girls in bathrooms. They love compliments.
But since I have to be good, I can't do any of those. And Chris and I can't be friends. We can't even be acquaintances.
I delete the message before it's sent.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Guys, I'm trying something new with the multimedia, I hope you can see it and that it isn't too annoying/weird. Let me know!
Also, can we collectively hope and pray that I'll be able to keep the updates coming consistently? (SEND HELP!)
