That's Why I Love You

Chapter 47

Octavia, sensing the tension, walked forward and stood next to me.

"You heard your Heda!" Octavia yelled. "Do as she says."

I gave her a soft smile of gratitude. She was like a Titus, of sorts. Soon enough, after much grumbling, the people began to disperse. Some went to the dining hall, but most back to their rooms.

"Now what?" She asked.

"Now you find your friends and make sure they're alright. Check on Clarke." I said heavily. I wanted more than anything to be the one to check on her, but my people needed me right now.

"What about you?" She asked, looking at me with concern.

"I'm going to find Abby and Kane." I said. "And then I'm going to join my warriors outside in their search."

Octavia shook her head and stepped forward. "No, you can't. It's not safe."

"What kind of Heda would I be if I let my people die? If I stayed in here with warmth and food while my people are out there lost and freezing?" I asked her calmly, wisdom resonating in my voice. 

"Lexa, if something happens to you Clarke's never going to forgive me." Octavia said. I looked into the girl's broken brown eyes and shook my head subtly.

"I'm sorry." I said, straightening my back and walking off, leaving her standing in the middle of the room. I kept my eyes focused ahead of me so I wouldn't look back.

I walked down to the medical bay, purposefully trying to keep my eyes off of Clarke's room. If I went in there now, I'd never leave.

I found a young man who I regularly saw with Abby. I hardened my face and walked up to him. He startled when he realized who I was. 

"Commander..." He breathed. He swallowed and started to bow. I shook my head at his foolishness and lifted him back up. 

"What is your name?"

"Jackson, ma'am." He said. I raised an eyebrow at the last word I heard. It wasn't one I was familiar with. 

"Where is Abby? Or Marcus?" I asked him. He swallowed but didn't answer. I narrowed my eyes at him. Abby was making him keep a secret for her. Jackson didn't want to get on her bad side, I could see that, but would he rather be on mine?

I walked closer to him, cornering him against a wall. He stared at me with wide eyes as I brought my face closer to his. I smiled internally, thinking of how Clarke used this tactic on me in my tent. With anyone else, I would've held my ground. But she knew exactly how to weaken me. 

"Where are they?" I seethed. 

He swallowed heavily. "Make two rights. It's the first door on the left." He said quietly. I pushed myself off him and walked out of the room. 

I followed his direction, hoping for his sake that he wasn't lying. I came to the door and heard hushed talking on the other side. I tried the handle, and when I found it was unlocked (surprisingly) I turned it and hesitantly walked through. 

Abby, Marcus and other leaders surrounded the table. I stopped in my tracks. 

"What is this?" I asked. 

Abby sighed. "We're discussing the storm."

I raised my head and stared at her questioningly. "While your people are outside panicking."

"We were going to give them direction any minute, at least until you intervened," Abby said.

I narrowed my eyes at the woman and stepped forward. I took what I said back. I was glad Clarke wasn't here to see this.