A Year of Stories (Collection Four)

The Old Murphy House

Dear Rachel,

I'm sorry it took so long for me to write to you.

If I'm honest, I just couldn't find the nerve.

You know that I love you, more than all the stars in the night sky, all the gods in the heavens, and you know that I would do anything for you, that I've done so much for you, but this, it didn't seem right...

Lily and Allan are in love, just like we are.

When I look into their eyes, all I see is the other reflected.

Merisa, they're just like us...

I mean, almost like us...

They're not cursed like we are.

They're together. They can hold each other tight. They aren't separated by this void, this endless gulf of unknowing.

I'm not going to lie, when I realized what they had, what we didn't, it made me furious.

But still!

But still, but still, but still, but still!

I don't understand why you asked me to do, to do that...

You have no idea how many nights of sleep I lost. How many broken mirrors, how many bruised fists... I didn't want to lose you, but I didn't want...

I don't know!

I didn't want to think that I was capable...

OK.

I did it.

I'm writing you today because I did it, just as you asked.

It wasn't difficult, it was easier than I thought it would be.

I'd been watching them for weeks. I knew their passwords, their door codes. I knew that they hid a spare key in the storm drain.

I went in while they were both at work, and left pictures, horrible pictures on Allan's computer. I'd taken those night classes, just like you suggested, learned to crop and splice images...

To make them real...

To make them powerful.

I left things on that poor man's machine, that will haunt me until the day I die.

And unlike him, I know they're fake.

After that, the phone call was easier still. Lily didn't even ask my name. I watched her drive home from work. I saw her through the window as she opened the folder, my folder...

She cried for an hour...

And then she started breaking things.

The police arrived just as Allan came home from work.

I don't even know what happened. Everything was just so quiet after that night, and I haven't seen either of them...

I haven't...

The house is for sale now.

Whatever happened, I guess it doesn't matter, they're gone...they're broken.

So yes, I did it, and now I'm writing to you again.

I'm going to leave this letter in the mailbox of the old Murphy house, just like the last one. Please, please, please send me something to let me know that you've read it.

The dreams aren't enough anymore.

I need you Rachel, and I need to know that you're real.

You are real, aren't you?

Aren't you?

Yours forever,

Devin