Holding My Tongue

With You I Can Sleep

Post-Deathly Hallows

Harry left Dumbledore's office and went looking for Ginny, returning to the crushing crowds of the Great Hall. That's when he saw him.

"Sirius?" Harry asked in disbelief his voice cracking. The man in front of him turned to present a tear streaked face to Harry, a face that was undoubtedly his godfather's.

"Sirius – what – how?" Harry asked in confusion. Sirius tried and failed to smile and tears simply splashed down his cheeks. Harry didn't understand for a moment then he realised why his godfather was crying.

"Sirius!" Harry heard Hermione say loudly and Sirius gave her another weak smile.

"Lupin –" He started and Sirius turned away crying into a shoulder behind him. It was a woman. Harry looked at the woman and couldn't look away. The woman's eyes were red and puffy like Sirius' but she looked so very familiar. Like someone he saw often but never really looked at and she looked somehow, backward.

Sirius was still crying and Harry's fatigued mind struggled to cope with the concept that his godfather was somehow back, somehow here, he looked away from him, anywhere but him and that woman. She was so familiar –

Harry's eyes caught on one of the gilt-frame mirrors that hung along this corridor. One long crack ran along its surface but it was otherwise untouched and in it Harry could clearly see his reflection. He stared at himself for a long moment and then looked back at the woman. The mirror, the woman, the mirror the woman, the mirror and back to the woman again.

She looked like him. Jet black hair that didn't sit exactly right at the back, like his hair, she had the same prominent cheekbones and face structure. There were slight differences, the shape and colour of the eyes, her skin was a shade darker than his and she was very short. But there could be no doubt he was related to this woman somehow.

She didn't break the eye contact but Harry could see the nervousness in her face, she bit the side of her lip in a familiar display of anxiety. He did that when he was nervous.

"Harry, maybe I should explain." Said a familiar voice and Harry turned to look at his fellow Gryffindor Andee. He stared at Andee letting his eyes wander back to the woman and saw that Andee was an exact replica of the woman.

"We look the same." Was all he could say.

Andee nodded mutely biting her lip.

"We're cousins." She said her voice cracking.

Harry could not believe what he was hearing.

"Cousins? But what – how -?" Harry said his mind racing half madly excited half wondering why Andee had not told him this sooner. Why had she for seven years not told him this? In fact Andee had almost seemed to avoid Harry but why would she if, if they were cousins.

"Me that's how. I'm Andee's mother." It was the woman, Harry turned to face her.

"James, your father, was my brother. Is my brother, always will be my brother." Another tear trickled down the woman's face.

"You – you're my aunt?" Harry asked, the woman nodded. Ron and Hermione slipped away silently and Harry nodded to Ron as they went.

"Elizabeth Jane Potter, that's me. James Potter's little sister. I suppose you want to know why I didn't take you in? Why I left you to those horrible people for all those years?"

Harry nodded half-afraid she would say she hadn't ever wanted him.

"Harry you have no idea how much I love you and loved your parents. I wanted you to live with me when they d-d – when, when it happened but Dumbledore needed to keep you safe with that enchantment and I had to be happy with living nearby and watching you grow up." The woman said pushing black hair out of her eyes that seemed to have a will of its own. Just like mine. Harry thought as he stared at this woman, Elizabeth.

"Why didn't anyone tell me about you?" Harry demanded looking at Sirius.

"I wanted too but it hurt to much." Sirius answered.

"What?" Harry asked confused.

"I left your aunt to find Peter where I thought she was safe, told her to just disappear like so many witches and wizards did. When I escaped Azkaban I couldn't find her.

So I went to Potter Manor and cast a spell on the gates – I couldn't go in see I'm not a Potter – a spell that would tell me who its master or mistress was. The manor is supposed to go to the oldest living Potter and as your aunt was unmarried she should have been. Yet it came up as you."

"I have a Manor?" Harry asked in awe

"It's pointlessly huge but your father and I - and Sirius for a while - grew up there. It was a place of laughter." Elizabeth said smiling slightly as she spoke.

"Andee is the second reason I went to Hogwarts to see if she was alive. They said she was raised in an orphanage. I took that to mean Elizabeth was dead." Sirius explained.

Harry looked back at Andee and saw the one feature that was not like Elizabeth's. Elizabeth had hazel eyes and Andee's were shockingly black. Harry's eyes unwillingly moved to his godfather's face and he saw those same eyes staring at him.

"She's your daughter." He said to Sirius pointing at Andee.

"She is. You two were meant to grow up together, back when you were children the pair of you were as close as James and I had been. You were meant to be the next generation marauders along with –" Sirius stopped as his eyes began to fill with tears again.

"Remus." Elizabeth finished for him and Sirius turned back to her crying into her shoulder.

"He has a son." Harry heard himself say.

"What?" Sirius asked in shock.

"He and Tonks, they had a son."

"Really? He and Dora, he always said he wouldn't –" Elizabeth said with a smile at Sirius.

"He lied." Harry's godfather said with a grin.

Harry's head hurt. He had an aunt, a cousin, Sirius was his uncle and he was somehow alive, he had just defeated Voldemort, so many people he loved were dead, everything was happening all at once and he was exhausted.

"Maybe it's time for Harry to go to bed." Elizabeth suggested to Sirius gently and Harry smiled at her, all he wanted to do was climb into his huge four-poster bed.

"Me too." Andee agreed. "I haven't slept next to Dean in so long."

Harry blinked surprised she would say such a thing in front of her parents but Sirius and Elizabeth only smiled.

"Whatever you want." Elizabeth said. "Let's go sit with Remus for a bit." She then said to Sirius who nodded still crying but looking less upset somehow.

"Night Harry."

"Night Sirius." Harry said waving.

His only thought as he lay his head down on his pillow was not of his godfather, his aunt, cousin or that he had just defeated the greatest dark wizard of all time. No, he thought only of Ginny and of how much he wished she could sleep beside him tonight.

Harry expected to fall right to sleep but his thoughts kept him awake. So many things to process, so much to share with Ron and Hermione, an entire life in front of him, free of prophecy and war Harry could do as he wished now.

He continued to toss and turn until a small hand touched his shoulder.

"Move over you." Ginny's voice whispered to him and Harry made room for her in the bed so that she could lie beside him.

"Did you miss me?" She asked quietly.

"You would not believe how much." He told her.

"I think I might be the only one who would." Was her only reply, then they fell silent, too tired to carry on talking. Lying beside Ginny was comfortable and Harry found to his thoughts growing less and less clear as his eyes grew heavier.

In moments he was asleep.