♤ ı [3] An Everlasting Love

ı 08 ı Thread

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"No one knows the pain you left behind, and all the peace you could never find."

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I HAD LAID on the road for what seemed like hours, or at least until the sun had set. I have been missing for a day now, and still I have no idea where I am. When no one came, and no cars passed I got up and continued walking in the direction I thought was right. Everything around me was either abandoned, covered in thick forests or non-existent.

Every now and then I hear faint whispers of voices coming in from directions all around me, or I'll hear the sound of a car in the distant, but every time I turn around, nothing is ever there. That's when I realize the hallucinations have started.

I haven't glanced back down at the bite, as that will only make things worse. I just want to find my way home before it's too late. I have absolutely nothing on me, not even my purse or phone which I have appeared to have lost, or perhaps I forgot it back at the warehouse I was held captive in. At this point I can't make sense of anything, and my mind feels as if it's spinning around and around in circles, holding onto sanity by nothing but a thin thread. I know soon that that thread is going to break, and I can only hope Theo won't see me like that. He doesn't know what I am, and the last thing I want to do is make him afraid of me.

The moon stays high in the sky with the stars clearly visible throughout the various clouds that are scattered about. It would almost be peaceful if I knew I wasn't dying.

Feeling myself starting to tremble again, I bite down on my lip and accidentally draw blood, not even noticing as the metallic taste runs across my tongue. I can't feel anything except for this throbbing sensation in my arm and the beads of sweat that roll down my face. I remember exactly what Damon was like, and I remember how insane he went. But he unlike me he had a chance. I am in the middle of no where, alone and desperate but somehow those feelings are all too familiar. I realize now that there's no way in hell I'm going to get back home alive, or any where for that matter as I stop at the side of the road and fall to the ground on my knees.

With shaking hands, I go on all fours and take deep breaths, trying to calm myself down but nothing is working. I'm shaking like I'm going to explode, like my body is slowly preparing to call it the end, but before it can do so I lay back on the road. I close my eyes and let the cool night breeze take away the sweat from my forehead and the dizziness of my mind. As my lip heals, I bite it once again, finding some sort of peace as the warm liquid drizzles across my dried lips.

"How many times have I told you not to do that?" James asks, laying down beside me.

I purse my lips to hide the blood drying on them and take in a deep breath at the sound of his voice. Slowly I open my eyes and turn my head, my blue eyes meeting his hazel blue ones that sparkly with the reflection of the moon. My eyes well with tears as he lays so close beside me, but as I glance down and see how our shoulders touch, but no tingly feeling of warmth and happiness spreading through me, I know this is nothing more than the werewolf venom playing tricks with my weak brain. My dying brain.

"You're not real," I say, brushing him off. Instead I turn my head and glance back up at the stars, trying to ignore his fake presence. I refuse to let myself believe that he is real, or I will have to restart the whole healing process all over again. However, it's a lot harder than it looks. I keep telling myself that I've accepted that he's gone and not coming back, yet whenever I see his face in my dreams or hallucinations I'm forced to rethink of how far I've come, if I've made any progress at all. Grieving is hard, way harder than Elena made it look which is a compliment to her I guess.