Chapter 22

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3 weeks later

It been a while since the big blow out fight happened with Jayden. A lot has happened, I don't have a boot anymore. I am playing softball again. Carly drives me to school. I now I sleep alone instead of cuddling with Jayden, to sleep.

Jayden and I haven't said a word to each other since the fight. We have barely looked at each other. The only reason I've been at his house is to see the cats. I found out that he is doing just as bad as me. Mason has tried to talk to me and I've ignored him every time.

Now I am at lunch. Yes I still sit at the table as him but don't sit next to him. I can tell that he is doing bad because half of the time he looks/is drunk and his hair is all messed up with bloodshot eyes. It hurts to see him like this, I want to just lay in his arms and tell him everything is going to be okay, and that I love him because I still love him a lot.

I walk out of my last class and run into of course Mason. "Can I please talk to you." He asked. 

"Ugh fine what." I finally gave up. 

"Look I'm so sorry about, well everything. Can I please make it up and take you to a like movie or something." He whines. Of course when he said the take me out part Jayden walked by. Once he heard that come from Mason's mouth he charged to the back of the school with anger. 

"Look Mason, I can't, okay. Especially since the thing between you and Jayden and stuff I can't. I am not interested in you like that I'm sorry." I say walking away toward the back of the school exit.

I see Jayden sitting on the bench. I don't know why but I have this urge to talk to him, even though we haven't talked in a while. 

"I said no!" I call out. There was no one else outside or around just us. He doesn't answer. He stands up from where he was sitting. 

"Why?" He asked. I take a deep breath and start. 

"Look Jayden, I don't care if we are together or not. I will still have feeling for you even if we aren't together. I can't stop the feelings I have I still love you! Yeah I know that what I just said probably meant nothing since I was just one of your "things" that you always have. I don't care that you don't think we will work or anything like that or that your the biggest player of the school, I still love you. And all of the words I said when we were together I still mean every single one." I finish taking another deep breath. 

"Sorry I had the get that out." I add looking anywhere but his eyes. I see him swallow hard.

After a few moments of silence I hear him mutter, "Fuck it!" 

I give his a confused look but am cut of seconds later but his cupping my face and kissing me passionately, just like when we were together. I grab his arms stabling myself since the impact of the kiss made me go tumbling backwards. I don't fight but kiss back, god I miss him like crazy.

We release from the kiss breathlessly. We rest our foreheads together. I close my eyes looking down. 

"I'm sorry. God every time I see you I just want to hold you and kiss you to death." He says, I smile a little. 

"No don't be I liked it." I answered now opening my eyes to look at his. 

"I know but I shouldn't have done tha.t" he says with a sorry look. 

"I don't care!" I tell his now cupping his face to. 

"I can't stay away from you Haven. No matter what I try to do or say to myself, I always come back to you," He admits leaving me stunned. "The non-selfish side of my knows that I don't deserve you and that you deserve someone better than me, but then my selfish side can't take the sight of you with someone else. The selfish side needs you." He says in a low voice. After a few more moments of silence I have to go home.

I walk home with a smile on my face instead of a frown. I don't know what this means for Jayden and I's future. My mom isn't home when I get home because she gets off of work at 5 and I get home at 3:30. I go up to my room and start my homework.

Three and a half hours later I finally finish homework. I run down the stairs and see my mom in the kitchen. 

"Hey mama!" I say happily kissing her cheek. 

"Well your happy." she says. I shrug and smile.

 "Yeah." I say simply. 

"What is for dinner?" I ask. I'm starving because I haven't ate because of homework. 

"I'm really tired so I might just get us Chinese take out or something." She say and I nod. 

"Sounds good!" I say cheerfully.

After I eat and get ready for bed, I hop in bed extremely tired. I go on my phone for a while before passing out.

Around midnight I hear my door opens and someone walks into my room. I open my eyes and see a black figure. 

"What are you doing here?" I ask sleepily after I realized who it was. Jayden. 

"Sorry to wake you I just was thinking about earlier and I wanted to see you, and I Tthought you were still going to be awake. I'll leave now." He says turning around. 

"No don't- I mean you don't have to if you don't want to" I say shyly. He smiles at me and walk to the other side of the bed and takes off his shoes, climbing into the bed next to me. I smile at him. 

"How did you get in?" I ask. He gives a little laugh than answers. 

"You never asked for the key back." he smile making me laugh. When we were together I got a key to his house and he got a key to mine. 

"Oh." I say.

"I miss this." I blurt out, damnit I didn't mean to say that. I guess he can see my regretful expression because he just laughs. 

"I do to," he smile and kisses me on the tip of my nose making me giggle. "Remind me why I ever thought leaving you was a good idea?" He questions making me smile again.

"Goodnight Haven." he says and I respond with, 

"Goodnight Jayden." We fell asleep like that with our arms wrapping around each other.

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