Evil Weenie!

Chapter 3

Ever since I can remember there has always been something weird going on in my head, aside from me being republican. It wasn't until I graduated highschool that I realized I had Cam living in my head. He comes out every time I feel scared, nervous or feel like I’m in some kind danger. He is kind of my defense mechanism.

Unfortunately, there is no sane version of me. Mac is just as crazy, but not a killer. If I think about it, I not only sit and watch Cam do all these things but I go along and enjoy the aftermath of his actions. That’s some pretty sick stuff if you ask me. Not to mention the fact that I’m talking about Cam like he is a whole other person. Kind of think about it, he technically is. I like to think of it as both of us paying rent in order to live in this weird mediocre body. Oh crap, I almost forgot about the rent! I better go into the truck and see what Cam left us with.

Oh man, smells like something died in here. Hehe, I’m so meant to be a stand up comic. Anyways, looks like Cam froze them already. And apparently he added his newest victim to the menu. “The Rock Slide Dog - fine grass fed meat seasoned with rock minerals”, wow Cam, really? “Who the hell will fall for that?! Rock mineral seasoning?”

knock knock knock

Who the heck is banging on my window?

“Excuse me sir, are you open yet?”

“Well, we are now. What can I get you?” Maybe a mineral dog...“Wow you're pretty”, Mac instinctively spoke out loud. Oh great here come the nervous sweats again.

Before Mac, stood a beautiful young woman with blonde hair. She laughed and replied, “thanks, I guess. And even though I'm flattered, I'm also hungry.”

“You have the most interesting color eyes” said Mac.

Why are you still talking? You idiot! She just told you she wants a hot dog. Oh crap! You can't sell her the rock slide burger. She is too pretty for that. She is also too pretty for me, I can only handle one disappointment at a time so I'm definitely not going to hit on her.

“Umm, thanks”, the girl replies. That's actually a first for me. Most people are weirded out by my eyes. It's called Heterochromia. It's  when you have two different colored eyes. In my case, I have one green and the other blue.”

Wow, two completely different colored eyes. Almost as if you are two different people meshed in one. Hetty, I can relate. Yes, my beautiful Hetty. Mac-n-Hetty sitting on a…

“My name is Isis! Are you ok? You just dazed out and started humming. You kept repeating the word hetty. You completely checked out. Do you do that a lot?”, asks Isis.

“So sorry, you are just so…”, Mac catches himself and stops talking.

“I'm what?, asks Isis. “Oh God, You’re not one of those weirdos are you? You're not going to ask me to come inside your truck then I'm never to be seen again? Cause I've been through that before and I havent been able to drink bubble tea ever since.”

Mac immediately defends himself. “No way Hetty-I mean, Isis. I would never do that to you. To others maybe. Just kidding. I'm not that kind of guy. Anyways let me get you the best dog I got in this truck.”

“Will that be the rock mineral dog”, Isis asks curiously. “Cause I have no idea what rock minerals you can use as seasoning”.

“Well Isis, you would be surprised how many pro-green hipsters want an organic mineral covered hot dog.”, says Mac with a grin on his face as he hands her a hot dog.

Isis laughs, “you're terrible.” Taking advantage of these poor soulless hipsters. Serves them well, I suppose. Well thanks for the hot dog.”

Mac nervously replies, “yeah, for sure. Its on the house. And it's animal meat, so don't worry about that. My name is Mac by the way.”

“Thanks Mac!”, Isis replies as she walks away slowly. “What else would it be if not animal. Thanks again, bye!

“Oh my dear Hetty”, Mac whispers under his breathe. “If only you knew.”

Well, I better take this truck down to the construction site on 33rd street. Feel like selling “rock slide dogs” to construction workers who just happen to be working on the very site where Cam killed this man. I can check out the murder scene. Maybe see if the cops linked anything to us.

As Mac slowly pulls out of the parking space he hears a banging on the side of his truck. “Cam, Cam stop the truck!”, a woman screams to him.

Mac immediately hits the brakes and his stomach drops. He knows what he heard. He sees a woman approaching from his side view mirror. Then a face appears on the window of the passenger side.

"Do you really not remember me Mac? I thought as soon as I said my name, it would refresh your memory. How many Isis do you meet on a daily basis? I guess that whole schizophrenia is real, huh?"

Isis opens the passenger door and climbs inside the food truck. With Mac in complete shock, she says, “Oh yeah, I know about Cam”.