Under my skin

Chapter 15

Thank you everyone so much for the support on this story it means the world, I am working on it little by little as this is only a side project and I appreciate that everyone is being patient with me. With that being said I would really like to post another story I've been working on and hope that you will all give it a chance as well? Please let me know! 

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-Kimberleexx

Chapter 15

Catherine woke to hear a faint beeping sound, she opened her eyes to see bright white lights and white walls surrounding her. She tried to sit up but was in a great deal of pain. quickly realizing she was in the hospital it took her a moment to remember what happened. Just as she reached for the call button the door opened and in walked her husband.

"You're awake." He commented as he took a seat at the edge of the bed, crossing one leg over the other.

"What happened?" Her voice came out hoarse and she reached for the cup of water at her bedside table.

"You had an ectopic pregnancy, there were complications and your fallopian tube burst." He was being so calm that she was getting scared. He should have started blowing up by now. Catherine didn't reply, she set the cup back on the counter and stared down at her lap.

"When were you planning to tell me about the baby?" He asked, his eyes boring holes into her.

"I wasn't." She told him honestly.

"God dammit Catherine, so what you were planning to do, get rid of it?" He asked, he'd jumped up from his spot at the edge of the bed and began pacing, something he did frequently when he was angry.

"Yes." She felt small, he was judging her before he even knew why. She was unfit for motherhood, she'd be neglectful just like her mother was to her, she wasn't cuddly and nurturing like a mother should be.

"With out even asking me first... My child... Our child." He was still pacing the floor, his hand running over his face a few times.

"Are you okay, in here? I mean is something not turning right?" He asked pointing to his head. She had to be fucking insane to give up his child without even consulting him first.

"I'm not crazy." She glared at him.

"You must be, to think that was even remotely okay!" He yelled, he was pissed beyond belief.

"I was doing us both a favor, you and I both know we aren't ready for a baby. I don't want children, I can't be a mother." She shook her head and then placed it in her hands.

"Answer this for me then, If I had asked you to keep it would you?" He ran a hand through his hair as she looked up at him, tears welling in her eyes.

"No." She shook her head again, she was prepared to give him everything she had, which wasn't much but it was all she could offer and she hoped it would be enough. Having a child isn't a decision you can make just so your partner is satisfied, she knew that and she hoped he knew that too.

"Why not?" Beau felt his heart fall into his stomach, the woman he loved and would give the world to if he could wouldn't give him the one thing he wanted other than her, a child.

"I just can't." He would never understand she thought, he grew up loved and sheltered he had the world at his feet and she had little to nothing.

"I know I'm not perfect Catherine but I have given you everything I have. I haven't asked you for anything in return until now and you can't even give me the one thing I want from you." He took a deep breath and watched as tears spilled down her face.

"You're a heartless bitch." He made his way to the hospital room door and turned to face her.

"And yet I still love you." He laughed a humorless laugh.

"You don't love me." She replied in full blown hysterics now. He stopped from walking out the door and turned to her again this time walking back to the bed.

"Of course I love you, I love everything about you. I love that you pretend to not want to be next to me in bed but cuddle up to me after you've fallen asleep, I love the little mole on right butt cheek, the way you laugh, I love that even when I'm not with you you're all that I think about." He grabbed her hand in his, rubbing circling on it with his thumb.

"I- I can't do this right now." Catherine pulled her hand away and began sobbing some more. She wasn't sure why this man had been brought into her life, maybe god or whatever higher power just wasn't done torturing her. Maybe she wasn't meant to be happy in this life. Beau headed for the door and didn't give her a second glance as he left the room.

Tears spilled from Catherine's eyes for what felt like hours, she tried to fall asleep but all the thoughts bouncing around in her head made it impossible causing her to continue her hysterics. A nurse came in and tried to calm her down but it was close to impossible, leaving her with no other choice but to go find her husband and see if he could calm her down.

Beau sat in the cafeteria with a nasty cup of coffee in his hand, Tyler and Cameron were on their way into the hospital to meet him and he was grateful for that, his brother always seemed to know what to do to calm him down. His eyes were trained on the door, not minutes later did the two men come into his view. They were holding hands and the both wore similar solemn expressions.

"How is she?" Tyler asked as he pulled out a chair at the cafeteria table for Cameron and then himself.

"She didn't want my baby." He looked down at the round white table, lost deep in his thoughts he couldn't understand why she didn't want the things he wanted with her.

"She was going to get rid of my baby." He mumbled, not really believing it himself.

"What's he on about?" Cameron asked. Tyler and Cameron hadn't been fully brought up to speed, they had no idea about the baby.

"Beau, what happened?" Tyler placed a hand on his shoulder, shaking him slightly.

"She doesn't love me." That was the only logical explanation, she didn't love him and thats why she didn't want his baby. Tyler and Cameron exchanged glances before a nurse approached the table.

"Mr.Barrett?" She asked, but Beau gave no response.

"Your wife is going to have to be sedated if she doesn't calm down she is at a major risk of ripping her wound open, would you like to give it a go?" The nurse looked at Tyler and Cameron and they all glanced back at Beau who was still in a dazed state of mind.

"He will be right up." Tyler assured the nurse, she looked hesitant but walked away.

"Beau listen to me, Cathy needs you right now. So get up and go hold your wife. I warned you this marriage wasn't going to be easy, so get your shit together." Tyler stood up and clapped his hands on each of Beau's shoulders and pulled him up right. He looked into his brother's eyes and saw the clear worry on his face, Beau closed his eyes briefly and reminded himself he wasn't weak before he headed for the elevator. He was not going to sob over this woman, if she didn't want him then he wasn't going to chase her. just as the elevator doors opened he heard it, the one and only sound that could break his heart. Catherine's cries filled the hallway and he rushed to her room, She was curled up on the bed facing the wall away from him. He took off his jacket and rolled up his sleeves before laying in the bed next to her, it was a very tight spot given it was only a hospital bed but his discomfort was worth it. Startled Catherine turned her head, her vision blurry but she was able to make out the face of her husband which caused her to cry more.

"Shh baby, i'm here." He told her, pulling her to him and caressing her arm. her sobs got smaller and she eventually only had silent tears. Beau noticed her slowing down and continued to hold her tightly, he wasn't much of a singer in fact he was terrible at it so he just hummed their song to her causing a ghost of a smile on her face and she turned to face him.

"I'm so s-" She started to apologize but he shushed her once more. He didn't want to argue, not when she was just starting to calm down. He thought he could give up on her but after seeing her so broken he knew he never would, he loved her too much and he didn't care if that made him weak or not.