Paradise City.

Chapter 61: Things Are Better if I Stay.

Chapter 61: Things Are Better if I Stay.

¬Peasnie¬

My stomach was full of butterflies as I parked outside the house. Yesterday was mine and Phil’s anniversary and we spent the day at the carnival and at the beach. We played games and went on rides and had lunch at the Grey Gull near the boardwalk. Then we went home, had a shower and got changed for dinner at a fancy restaurant then we went to see a movie before we went for a walk on the beach. I got Phil a silver bracelet that had James’ and Nevaeh’s names carved into the base. Phil got me a heart locket, it’s beautiful. Yesterday evening Dan and Melissa brought the babies home and stayed for a few drinks and a chat. I gave James a bath before putting him to bed. Nevaeh went to bed when Phil and I did but she was asleep before that. Today Phil has the day off since it’s a Sunday so he’s at home with Nevaeh; I brought James to see his Grandma. Bailey will be happy to see us.

I stared at the little boy in the rear view mirror anxiously; he played with his rubber dinosaur and spoke gibberish along to the radio. My heart was pounding against my ribs as we sat out in the car that cloudy summer day. I didn’t call or anything but there is a few places Bailey would be and since her car is parked in the drive she’s here. I inhaled deeply and closed my eyes as all the pain that I’ve been feeling towards this was at the surface and I felt exhausted, I wanted to turn around and never come back. The police report said that the cause of death was a miss dosage of the antibiotics they put him on after the operation, he got an infection because the dosage was too little. I was so angry when I found that out, I kicked over the coffee table when I found out. I wanted to find out the Doctor’s name and address, the one who did the dosage and I wanted to let him know that my dad is dead because of him. I am so angry and hurt that human error is the reason my dad is dead. The reason why my family is falling apart at the seams, they’re the reason why everything is ruined, broken apart and now we have to put the pieces back together again without my dad.

“You can do this.” I reassured myself, white knuckling the steering wheel. I sighed heavily again and opened my eyes to see Alfie emerging out of the house, she quickly walked down the path and up the street towards the beach. I blinked away the tears in my eyes as I watched her carefully. She was dressed far too inappropriately for her age. It’s not like Alfie to dress like that or leave the house alone. I know she stays within the block but she usually has a friend but here she’s all by herself.

“Where are you going?” I asked lowly, furrowing my eye brows at her. I felt uncomfortable with the clothing choice she had, it was far too provocative for a girl her age. She’s going to be eleven in October and she’s dressing as if she’s fifteen, sixteen years old. I didn’t like it and neither would dad.  I wanted to follow her but I had to talk to Bailey. My stomach fell again when I remembered why I was here.

“Here we go.” I told myself as I switched off the Volvo and pulled the key out of the ignition, climbing out of the car. I grabbed James out of his car seat and carried him up the path to my childhood home. The butterflies exploded into more fluttering butterflies as I helped James up the steps and to the front door. I picked him up so he could ring the doorbell. He loved pushing buttons so might as well please his button pushing side so he’s not pushing my buttons. I heard people talking, arguing more like it, which only made my stomach turn. It was Kier and Bailey fighting about something, their yells was muffled. That’s really odd because Kier never raises his voice to anyone, especially his parents and family. And Bailey only yells when she absolutely has to.

James gave me a frightened look when there was a loud slam. I held him a little closer as he nestled his face into my hair. I saw someone coming to the door, a red head. Bailey. I put on a brave face and smiled at her as she opened the door. Bailey looked terrible, she wasn’t pale but she was grey with dark rings around her eyes along with bags, her lips were pale and chapped and she looked like a complete mess. Her eyes were also blood shot and puffy. I can’t tell if it’s because she’s been crying or not sleeping, probably both. She didn’t even smile when she saw me.