My Little World

Chapter Three

Xavier's POV

There is something about that woman that just makes me want her more. Ever since our first meeting she's been on nerves and it so refreshing to meet someone who isn't pushover.

I've seen her work, studied it carefully. She can make simple look elegant. She has this unbelievable talent that's so rare to find. With her vision I can finally finish my dream project just the way I want. I've heard how great her leadership qualities are. All the people who work for her love her and trust her every decision even if it puts them in jeopardy. That's how significant her work is.

It's not just because of her work or her qualities, there's something about her personality that amazes me. She's so much more than what eyes meet and for some reason, unknown I want to know more about her. I've never felt the need to know someone to the depth. I believe the more emotionally you get involved, the easiest it is for that person to hurt you but somehow I'm okay to take that risk with Tara.

Everything about her makes me restless, there is this unexplainable need for me to know everything about her. It's like a broken record. No matter how much I try not to think about her or how much I need her assistance in my dream project, I can't help it but think. At this point I'm just raffled and highly irritated how my brain would just not give up the thought of her.

Tara's POV

I took a cab to return to office since my car and other stuff where in the office and my ride abandoned me for no particular reason. I couldn't stop thinking about the opportunity I'm letting slip away. There's so many dreams I could've fulfilled with this simple yet amazing offer but I know there something way more important than my dreams here. 

I walked into the office, after collecting my stuff I marched towards Sam's office.

"Sam I-"

"He called off the deal Tara" Sam informed me with a sad smile. I felt guilty as I'm responsible for it.

"Sam I'm sorry I really tried hard to convince him but he didn't. You know I can't leave. You do understand my situation here, don't you?" 

"It's okay Tara. You're like my little daughter and I understand the importance of your decision. I'll be okay, don't worry"

"Thank you Sam for always being there and understanding me" I said and hugged him.

I've been through a really rough time in my life and Sam was there for me. I understand a lot of things my parents couldn't and helped me. I owe him so much that it is impossible to express in words. He treats me just like his own daughter and it breaks my heart that I couldn't do this for him.

One always try to run away from past but sometimes we really can't because something of that past reminds you of all the things you think you could've done differently. It's funny how we try to convince yourself that it doesn't hurt, that things in the past don't matter anymore but they do. The wounds of the past hurt, it still makes you vulnerable. Even though I'm not very found of the things in past or the hardship I've faced I'm very grateful. My one mistake has given me the best thing I could've ever asked for. That one lesson has indeed given me a new life for my myself and I'm so thankful for that.  

"I'm home guys!" I screamed as I entered my house with strawberry cheese cake.

"Hey! How was your day?" Jess asked as I put the cake on the kitchen counter.

"It was okay but-"

"MOMMYY!" I was cut by daughter Emma holding a paper in her hand with twinkling green eyes.

"Hey baby" I picked her up and settled her on my hip

"See! I do painting and Jess helps me with it!" My daughter showed me her painting excitingly. She almost four and still learning to speak properly but I've to say she's a very quick learner.

"It's beautiful, baby" I kissed her cheeks and she giggled. "Mumma got your favourite strawberry cheesecake" I told her and put her on the dining table.

"Yay!"

"Jess I'll just change and come to help you and then I can help you" she nodded.

Jessica is a writer and mostly works for home and also babysits Emma. She stays home and baby-sits Emma mostly since I've a full time job. Everyone who knows her think that she's her daughter since she takes Emma to work with her sometimes. Jessica has been the pillar of support throughout. I don't know what I would've done if it weren't for her. When I had Emma I was completely lost and clueless as how I was supposed to raise her all by myself with everything else in my life falling apart but she came through. She gave the hope I needed and the support I wanted at that time.

Emma is the reminder of my past, the past that's cruelly hurtful. She looks exactly like her father, those same brown curly hair, green twinkling eyes, those cute dimples. Everything about her reminds me of that man who I despise, the man who broke my heart into tiny little pieces.

She's my darling daughter and I love her to my death. But there are things that I can't explain to her yet, there are things I've to protect her from. She's too young to be scrutinized by the judgment people around. It's difficult being a single parent but what's more difficult is a being a child of a single parent, people will have all sorts of opinions. They'll ask her questions she'll not have answers to. They'll ask me things that are better remain unexplained.

Not many people in my life know about Emma, just the close ones. I've kept her under the radar for almost three just so she is safe and grows up like any normal kid. There's nothing I would want to do to risk that. She's been living here since her birth, she feels home here and I can't just move neither can I leave her here. Her needs are always more important than what I want.

"Earth to Tara?" Jess snapped me out of my thoughts. I was sitting on the dining with Jess and Emma. "What are you thinking so hard?"

"Just about my day.. nothing serious" she nodded.  "Come on let's go to sleep"

I got up and took her in my arms to her room. She giggled throughout and told me about her day at school and some random things. I tugged her in her bed and kissed her goodnight.

"I love you baby"

"I loves you too mommy"

I walked and Jess was sitting on the couch with two mugs of coffee. I took one mug and sat next to her.

"Tell me about it"

I told her about everything starting from me bumping into him to he saving me from embarrassment to going on lunch to rejecting his offer. Everything.

"Are you insane? You left something which would've helped you fulfil your dream to start your own business"

"No dream is important than Emma. Moreover I can't tell people about her, there are still questions I don't have answer to. Jess, she feels home her around you and me and the little people we know I can't just pack up our bags and leave. This is safe for her, this is safe for me. There is so much she'll have to deal with as she grows up but that has time, she shouldn't start facing all of that just right now. I'm just trying to protect the both of us from the questions and doubts and what not that'll follow once people start to know about her."

"Tara, someday or the other we've to tell everybody about Emma and we've no getaway for that and you know that. All I'm saying it was a nice opportunity. All you had to do is live in LA for sometime until you're ready to start something of your own and then you can protect her all you want. I know how much you love her, she's your daughter but someday you've to take a risk for yourself. You can't just hit a pause because you're afraid what might happen if your past comes up. You can't always live in that fear, you need to fight back someday."

As she said that I thought and it made sense but he has already cancelled the deal.

"He has already called off the deal and I don't want to talk about it anymore."

I said and walked to my room to sleep this day off.