Lost and Insecure

Chapter 19

Lexa played her heart out. From the minute she sat down at the piano until her fingers found the last chord, she allowed her emotions to pour freely and reverberate through the cafe in a melodious wave.

She had been working at Grounder's Cafe for a few weeks now, and each time she came in and played, people were impressed. But tonight, they were astonished by her skills, and they applauded her generously when Lexa finished up her last song of the night.

"Well, Lexa, I've gotta say, that was pretty fucking impressive," Raven laughed and nudged Lexa's shoulder. The taller girl smiled lightly at her and leaned up against the bar. Her eyes followed Raven's towel as it wiped across the surface of the counter several times.

Raven noticed Lexa's vacant staring, "You okay?"

It took Lexa a second to acknowledge raven's question, she slowly lifted her eyes and nodded her head, "Yeah, I'm fine. Just a bit tired maybe," she lied.

Raven didn't buy it, but she just shrugged and continued cleaning nonetheless.

After a few silent moments, Lexa looked up at Raven, stumbling over her words as she asked, "So, like, um...Clarke and, uh, Bellamy. They used to, like, sleep together?"

Raven gave her a momentary look of confusion, then nodded her head, "Once. Maybe twice. Why?" She raised one eyebrow.

Lexa stared down at the bar, picking at the leather bracelet on her left wrist. She shrugged her shoulders, offering a half hearted "I dunno."

"Are you...jealous?" Raven laughed and squinted at her. When Lexa didn't respond, she concluded, "Oh my god, you are! That's adorable."

Lexa gave her a glare, but could feel her face burning up. She rolled her eyes when she saw the smirk playing at Raven's lips.

"Don't worry, everyone's slept with Bellamy. Hell, even I did once, but we don't talk about that," Raven grimaced at the memory, then steadied her gaze on the brunette. "If you're worried about either of them having feelings for each other, you shouldn't. Bellamy doesn't have feelings, A. And, B, It's pretty obvious Clarke only has eyes for you so I think you're definitely okay there."

Lexa scoffed, "Yeah, I guess you're right." She remembered the moment she and Clarke had shared a few nights ago, when she sleepily declared her love for the blonde without even thinking twice about it. More importantly, she remembered Clarke's response, her words heavy with a smile, "I love you too, Lexa Woods."

Despite all that she'd been through, the things that haunted her, kept her up at night, Lexa considered herself lucky. Sure, her conniving, hypocritical ex-girlfriend had decided to pop back into her life without warning, leaving her with a temporary emptiness and a slight concussion. But, at least she had Clarke, who was there to wipe her tears and love her despite the baggage she carried.

Lexa caught herself blankly staring when Raven ducked to meet her gaze. "Are you sure you're okay? Clarke mentioned you not feeling well or something, do you want to take tomorrow off?" Raven sounded genuinely worried.

Lexa shook herself out of her own thoughts and forced a small smile in Raven's direction, "No, really, I'm fine. I think I just need a good night's sleep. Thanks, though." Lexa shouldered her backpack and waved behind her as she made her way out of the cafe, the bells on the door ringing as it shut behind her.