Liam
When I hear the door shut behind me I can't help but let out some of the rage building up inside of me. The only thing I have on me is my phone so I throw it against the wall and when that doesn't satisfy me I throw my fist against the wall too. I should know better. Now the entire screen of my phone is shattered and my knuckles are bloody. Perfect. Probably a stupid move on my part but at least it's a distraction. I'm half tempted to just say fuck it and go down to hotel bar and get completely wasted. I don't want to feel anything. But I know that probably wouldn't help matters either. Louis's room is only a few doors down from mine so I pick up my destroyed phone and walk the few feet down the hall slowly before stopping in front of his door and knocking loudly. I'm praying to god he's alone tonight and I don't have to go unload my sorry ass on someone else for the night.
He looks shocked at first when he opens the door. That's when I realize what I probably look like. I'm showing up outside his door at two in the morning in nothing but my shorts with blood dripping from my hand. When he lets me in I explain that I had a fight with Liv and I really don't want to talk about it but he doesn't let me leave it at that. I have to go through the whole story of her revelation of not being ready to move in with me. Of course it only makes me angry again. He tries to calm me down, reassuring me that Liv loves me and her not wanting to move in with me yet isn't crazy. As if I don't already know all of that. The fact of the matter is, that's not what I'm pissed about. I'm angry because once again, she's completely shut me out. I still can't believe she kept all of this from me. I've told her time and time again to just let me in but she never does. I don't know if she ever will at this point. I know Louis is tired and frankly, so am I. So I pretend that his advice helped so we can both go to sleep. He's snoring instantly when he climbs into his bed but I'm not so lucky.
I try to sleep but I'm flopping around on the small couch all night, trying to get comfortable. Even when I give up and lay down on the floor I can't seem to get into a position I like. I think the real problem is a combination of the thoughts going through my head and not having Liv's small body curled up next to me. At one point I almost say fuck it and go back to our room. I'm still pissed at her but that doesn't mean I don't miss her. But I know we really do need some time to cool off before we revisit our conversation. Her hurt expression when I told her I was leaving is still etched in my brain. When I finally see the clock on my phone turn to 8 oclock I give up, deciding the waiting period is over. I can go talk to her now. I really don't even know what I'm going to say to Liv this morning to be honest but I do know that I'm ready to see her.
When I get to the door I'm not sure what to do so I knock and stand back while I wait for her to answer it. It's taking longer than I thought so I knock again, hoping she's here. I don't know where else she would go but my mind is still racing, trying to figure it out when she opens the door. When I see her I immediately want to wrap her in my arms but I restrain myself. I feel almost guilty for blowing up like I did last night. She looks different somehow today then she did last night. I can tell she didn't get much sleep either. Her wide eyes are rimmed in red and glassy, letting me know she's been crying. Her stance is even different. She's sort of hunched in on herself, making her slight frame look even smaller. She's pulling at her fingers nervously while she looks up at me, unsure of where to start. However, I can't help but put up my defenses when I see Niall sitting on our couch. Is she seriously sitting here, venting about me to Niall? Telling him all about our fight before even talking to me about it? I know I talked to Louis but that's different. He's my friend. So is Niall. It would be different if it was Lexie or Gemma or Lou sitting on that couch. Why is Liv confiding in Niall all of a sudden? I try to keep my face neutral until Niall leaves but as soon as he does, I can't help but let my annoyance come to the surface a little.
