A Principle of Honour

Chapter 15

While Cassie was lighting the cheroot, Verity was able to make a closer examination of her sister's face. Around her eyes and lips, small hair-like lines, the first signs of dissipation, were beginning to reveal themselves. Her skin that had first appeared in the salon to be clear and flawless was starting to become sallow. The reflection of her face, in the large mirror, highlighted the dark smudges under her eyes. She looked tired and a good deal older than her nineteen years.

Cassie stretched out on the chaise long and continued to smoke. 'My dear sister,' she eventually said, sarcasm dripping in her voice. 'Do you remember Major Ellington? He came to Hadlands the night of the storm.'

Verity nodded, 'yes, I do. I recognised him with you earlier in the salon. Why are you here with him?'

'Be patient, V,' I will get to that presently.' Cassie said as she drew once more on the cheroot. 'I will start at the beginning when Major Ellington walked through our front door, on the night of the storm, and I saw him for the first time.'

When she had finished speaking, she drew on the cheroot and then slowly released a cloud of smoke.

'Do you remember those gothic romantic novels we used to read?' She continued, 'you know, V, the ones that had tall, dark, handsome heroes and young, impressionable, insipid heroines?'

Verity smiled and nodded, 'I remember, after our father's funeral, we used to read them out loud to pass the time.'

'And, do you remember the night of the storm, we were reading one together. I cannot remember the title, or who wrote it, but I remember just wanting to be like the heroine. All I longed for was a tall, dark, handsome storybook hero to come and sweep me off my feet, just like in the novel. Can you imagine my delight when Major Ellington came to our door, looking every inch the image of the perfect man I had constructed in my mind's eye? A real-life hero, with a gash on his forehead and a limp caused by an old war wound. I fell in love with him, the moment he walked through our door.' Cassie sighed at the memory. 'Do you remember, you sent us to the drawing room, and I cleaned his wound. Of course, a libertine like Ellington left unattended, with a young, impressionable girl, did not take long to make his first move.'

'That evening, he kissed me,' she said, as though it was something very ordinary, 'it made me feel, for the first time in my life, alive. Before you came back, he had persuaded me to meet him later that night. I could not refuse.'

'But, we were in the same room. I would have heard you leave.' Verity said, with concern.

'Once you had fallen asleep, I crept out and spent the night in Ellington's bed.' Cassie smoked again, as she let her sister come to terms with what had happened. The smoke, like her words, hung heavy in the room.

'Cass, if I had known, I would have stopped you.' Verity said, closing her eyes.

'You did warn me, and I only have myself to blame. I genuinely thought he had honourable intentions and wanted more than just to take away my maidenhood. I made an error of judgement by mistaking lust for love. I thought they were the same.'

'You could have told me. I may have been able to help.' Verity said, her voice full of sadness.

'But Verity, I was young, only just seventeen. I was still only a girl in the body of a woman. I did not know how to handle the passion he evoked in me. In my naivety, I thought you were an old maid, who did not know the first thing about love. You did warn me that men like Ellington would not marry someone like me.'

'Did he lie to you?' Verity said softly. 'Did he promise marriage?'

'No, he never promised to marry me. He did talk to me many times, about marriage and children, and I always assumed that it would be me he would choose as a bride. I did think that he was an honourable man, with honourable intentions. And, because he made love to me, I thought that I would get my fairy tale ending, just like in the novel.' Cassie shifted and laid her head back on a cushion.