Beneath the Sharps & Flats

♫Chapter 41- I Open My Eyes to More Darkness♫

Chapter Forty-One

I don't know how long it's been since Jace left. I can't keep track of time in this place, especially since I fall asleep or get sucked into a blacker darkness sometimes. I'd assume it's been about two or three weeks, but as I mentioned before, I'm not entirely positive.

My friends come and go, telling me about their days by ranting, squealing, or just comforting. From the times I've been awake (which has been more frequent lately), I haven't heard from Gen or Colton at all. Wes and Taylor tell me that Colton knows exactly where Jace is located in Texas, but it's the second largest state in America and when I wake, I can't just roam every square inch searching for him. By the time I found him, I'd be eighty-two and graying which obviously would not be a turn on for Jace.

I sit alone in pain, curled up into a ball on the ground when I'm not sleeping or wasting my effort trying not to claw out of this hell hole. I've never dreamt before; only had brief flashes of memories in which I hysterically laugh or cry. So when I get sucked into the "hole of darkness" (that's what I'm calling it now) without putting up a fight this time, I can honestly say I'm genuinely shocked to find myself caught in a dream.

It was eerily dark as I made my way to the spot Jace showed me. Obviously, he's not around to protect me now so I have to pull up my big girl panties and put on a brave face. I know the crunching of the leaves on the ground below me is caused mainly by my feet, if not by a small animal. I sigh, surprisingly, not finding the urge to wail or scream from everything that's been occurring in my life. I just take a seat on one of the tree stumps with my head in my hand, blankly staring at the unlit pile of broken branches in the center of the clearing.

"I see he showed you his spot," a voice speaks up from behind me.

I whip around quickly to face the person who put me in this predicament in the first place. The person who's made my life a living hell from the moment I started senior year. Startled and frankly, terrified, I place and hand to my chest and heave a dramatic gasp.

"So you can't stay around to make my life a living hell so you corrupt my dreams?" I grind out, a sudden burst of anger filling my chest.

She carries the same knife from that night in her hand, her fingers lightly stroking the blade as she frowns. "It wasn't my desire to corrupt your life, Violet. I didn't want to hurt you."

I scoff. "'I didn't want to hurt you' my ass! You freaking leapt on me like a lion would leap on its prey! And on top of that, you crashed my car and put me in a coma. Now Jace is gone, and it's all your damn fault." By the time my mini rant comes to a close, tears are stinging my eyes and my chest is pulsing with anguish.

"I'm sorry," she whispers, "this is only a dream and not real, just memories in your brain from today coming together and forming a bunch of pictures. You probably wish that I were my calm, normal self that day so you wouldn't be unconscious and fighting for your life."

"I do," I whisper, suddenly not able to meet her eyes, "all I wanted with you was to have a civil conversation."

"The only way you can do that when you wake up is visiting me at the sanatarium," she hints, and I glance up to notice a small small on her face.

"Hell no," I'm too quick to reply, and instantly feel bad when I notice the expression of hurt cross over her face.

"I guess that's asking a little too much." She shrugs. "I would be surprised if you ever wanted to see me again."

"Why are you being so nice? This isn't the Jessica I know."

"The Jessica you know had a disease that made me act in the thoughts that I conjured up in my brain," she tells me, "you never had a chance to meet the real me because you were on my shit list."