POINT OF VIEW → bts fanfiction

Chapter 34

Every time I looked at my phone or passed one of the Bangtan members in the hallway, I became so tempted to contact him. To call him or find him at school. Even go to his house. But I hadn't said a word to him since his confession. And each moment that I waited to talk to him made my opportunity seem farther and farther away. I knew I had to before he left, though. We couldn't just leave it like this for a year.

A year. An ache shot through my stomach. A year was too long.

••••••

"Nabi. Are you listening to me?" Rachel's voice was distant.

"Yeah," I said, staring at my water bottle.

"Nabi!" She said louder.

I winced and shook my head.

"Yeah, I'm listening. Sorry." I turned to her.

"You've been so out of it for the past few days," she commented.

Because he's leaving tomorrow.

"Sorry. Must be because of exams," I mumbled.

"Nabi..." She sighed. "Is this because of V? You still haven't said anything to him. It's been like a week!"

She didn't know about him leaving yet. And I didn't feel like telling her. I didn't want her to make a huge deal out of it. Even though it sort of was a huge deal.

"I know." I looked back down.

He's leaving. I grimaced.

"I need to go to the bathroom." I stood.

"Yeah, okay. See you in class," she said as the bell began to ring.

I nodded and turned, beginning to walk slowly towards the exit. I did go to the bathroom, but when I stepped into a stall, I just leaned against the wall. Pulling out my phone, I took in some deep breaths. I stared at the screen, fingers on the key board. Just do it. I urged myself. Just text him. I chewed my lips and stood there, frozen. It seemed like time was standing still as I began to type in the letters.

Suddenly, unfamiliar voices filled the restroom, and I paused and blinked, as if being snapped from a trance. I looked at the message I'd begun to type.

"We should talk before you leave..." It said.

I grimaced and deleted it, shoving the phone back into my pocket. Hating myself.

••••••

I stared out the window, watching the sun rise. My eyes burned and my limbs ached. That always happened when I stayed up straight through the night. I couldn't fall asleep. I'd just lain there in bed, until I'd kicked away the sheets in frustration and began to go through my notebooks. Now a dim light began to trickle into my room, so I'd paused my reading to go sit on my small bed and watch the day arrive.

Watching the dawn had always put me in soaring spirits, as if the world was beautiful and full of life and wonder. But today, the rising sun sent a flooding dread through my body, and I wished the night would come back. Something I never thought I would wish for. I chewed my lips and glanced away from my window. My eyes darted around my room in sick anticipation.

9:30 am. That was when his flight would be taking off. He would be gone for a whole year. I squeezed my eyes shut and shook my head. Just keep reading. I decided. I turned to my shelf and continued skimming through the unfinished stories, hardly paying attention to the written words. Why do you feel like this? Because he's my friend. Is that all it is? I don't know. Questions flew through my mind, and my head began to ache. Although, maybe that was just from the lack of sleep.

I forced my tired eyes to continue reading, trying to ignore the never ending chant. He's leaving. I grabbed another one from the shelf. He's leaving. I bit my lips harder. He's leaving. I scowled at the pages, trying to focus. He's leaving. But my mind couldn't be silenced. He's leaving. I roughly turned the page, tearing it just a bit. He's leaving. I scanned the page, reading each word slowly. He's-- I suddenly froze. My eyes froze. My mind, for the first time in a week, was actually quiet.

Because there, on the page of that old notebook, was handwriting that was definitely not mine. It was tinier, firmer. As if the writer was pushing down on the pencil more. My breath caught in my throat.

Nabi- don't hate me! I hope you don't find this until after we become so close that we can laugh about this.. It was V.

A mix of emotions smacked me all at once. I was upset with him getting into my stuff, especially things so personal. I was confused, wondering when he wrote this. Realization was dawning, as I remembered calling him after our first fight. I was sad too, wishing we could go back to when things were like this, even if it meant being him again. And lastly, I was really, really happy. I actually felt giggles bubbling inside of me. Although, that could have also been because of sleep deprivation. I continued to read his message.

I'm just really bored right now, so here's a little addition to your story. P.S. None of theses books are finished. Is that on purpose?

I began to laugh at that, small chuckles that could have been a mixture of laughter and sobs. He'd finished one of my books. One of my favorites. It was one about a girl falling in love with Mr. Death. I hadn't really known where I'd been going with the plot line, and it had fallen apart. So I had bailed.

I read all that he had written, completely overwhelmed and involved with his finished version. The chant had ceased. My mind was only filled with his bad grammar and overly dramatic scenarios. Laughter continued to fill my small bedroom, and I began to feel wetness on my cheeks at one point. But I ignored the tears and kept reading. Kept laughing.

I could hear his voice in my head, narrating the story. It didn't take long to finish what he'd written. And I was disappointed when it ended. After the words "the end", he'd written one more small message.

Maybe when you find this, we can start writing about our supernatural experience together, okay? Writing is actually kind of fun. Thanks Nabi.

I was silent again by the time I finished reading. I closed the book and hugged it to my chest, laying back on the floor. For the first time in who knows how long, I was actually sure of myself. My mind was actually made up. And I'd never been more sad and happy at the same time before.

I like Taehyung.

And he was leaving in less than five hours.

Hey again! Sorry for the long wait, or at least the longer than usual wait. I really hope you liked the chapter! Don't forget to vote and comment if you did!