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Chapter 17: I'm Only Human

   When I arrive back at my flat I head straight to my room and fall on the bed. Tears collect in my eyes as Dan comforts me saying things like "everything is going to be okay," "I love you."

   I had so many questions I wanted- no, needed to ask Dan. The tears have slowed enough that I can talk and I decide to ask Dan some of my questions.

"Dan?" I say, my voice weak.

"Yes, Phil?" His voice is kind and understanding, I've grown to love it.

I take a breath as I think over my wording.

Dan's POV

"How are you talking to me?" Phil says after hesitating.

   Of course he's asking. I knew I would have to answer eventually.

"I'm uh- I kind of... Hijacked your phone?" I figured I would subtly hint that I'm actually in his phone, this is a good start.

Through the camera I can see his head nodding a bit. I can see on his face that he still has many questions for me.

"Is there anything else you want to know?" If Phil is going to ask questions I might as well support the conversation.

"Yeah, umm... Why? Why me?"

What did he mean by that? Why me?

"Phil, what do you mean 'why you'"?

"Why did you chose me out of everyone?"

"Phil... I didn't choose you. I- I love you. I-"

I start trying to explain my feelings for Phil but he cuts me off. "Tell me about yourself."

"Alright. Ummm, what do you want to know?"

"What's your last name? I assume you know mine already." He chuckles at the end it feels as if the whole world was fixed of all its problems.

"Howell. My name is Dan Howell."

As I say this I can hear Phil quietly saying my name. Cautiously saying each sound and letting it roll off his tongue. Never did I think that Phil Lester, the AmazingPhil, would be saying my name.

"Dan Howell. I like it." His smile grows and I can feel my heart tense up in my chest with a smile spreading across my face as well.

"Phil?"

"Mhm" he hums softly. To be quite honest the sound sends chills down my spine, and a pain in my chest.

"Do you have any more questions for me? I feel like this must be a lot of information to take in right now."

I sigh and run my fingers through my hair.

"Dan don't worry, I feel like I just need a shower or something to relax right now"

That makes sense, it's been a long day and he deserves something relaxing.

"Can I come with you?" I ask not thinking through my words very well.

"um. I-"

"Nonono I'm sorry I just meant like stick me in a drawer and I can play music for you or just listen to you sing I didn't mean-"

I'm interrupted by Phil's soft chuckles. I don't know whether in this moment, his laughter eases my embarrassment or enhances it. The combination of my sigh and the warm blush I feel grow on my cheeks indicates a strange combination of the two.

"Yes you can come in the shower with me Dan."

*****

You see at the moment I had nothing to do but listen as Phil sang beautifully. Which hurts because he himself is already beautiful. He shouldn't be allowed to exist, he's too perfect it's unfair.

I shut my eyes as I listen to him belt out a few lines of a song I recognize and I sing along, finally feeling calm.

"Hopelessly I'll love you endlessly"

His voice quiets followed by a giggle.

"It's your turn" he chuckles

I sigh, not wanting to let Phil down I sing nervously.

"Hopelessly I'll give you everything"

"But I won't give you up, I won't let you down, And I won't leave you falling If the moment ever comes."

Our voices singing in unison during the last few phrases sends shivers down my spine.

"Dan?"

The water shuts off and I respond with a hum.

"I love you too."