Open Relationship

Chapter 18

“Should’ve known…” She whispered. “I called mom and dad. I told them you’re okay, but they’re insisting on coming to see you this week. Just prepare for that. I have to head back to the club with Wes though so we can make sure the place isn’t a wreck. Do you want me to take you home?”

“I think I can manage it.” Noah interjected and Hollis let out a sigh. She waited for me to answer and I nodded, letting her know it was okay. “It’ll give us a little time to talk.” He added after Hollis hugged me and went to pull Wes from Abby. They both assured me they’d see me once they checked on the club and headed back to the apartment.

“I have something to talk with you about.” She regarded Noah suspiciously for a moment before adding, “I’ll meet you at the apartment and we’ll talk then.” I smiled and nodded, giving her a hug as well before we all headed out into separate cars.

“Why are you here Noah? Not that I’m not grateful for what you did, but I just…don’t understand what you’re expecting here.” I asked slowly.

“I know you said you want that other guy more than me,” Noah started, “but I just couldn’t accept that. I couldn’t tell you that I was okay with it. That would’ve been a lie. I…I have such strong feelings for you James, that I can’t stop thinking about you. You showed me what I really want in life.”

“Noah…” I wanted him to stop.

“No, James, you need to listen. I’ll keep trying. You can keep denying me, but I know that there’s something between us. You can’t tell me you don’t feel it.”

“I…I do feel something, Noah. But, what I feel for Landon is stronger, and I can’t ignore that fact. Wouldn’t you hate knowing that? Wouldn’t it bother you?”

“Not if I’m the one who gets to have you. I’m still the lucky one then.”

I let out a long sigh. “I can’t just give you an answer right now.” I said, feeling exhausted. All I wanted was to curl in my bed and forget this entire day.

“I know, but I needed to tell you.”

When we made it to my apartment, I could tell he wanted to walk me up but Abby was waiting for me on the steps. Whatever she wanted to talk about must’ve been important. Noah pulled me into a hug and kissed my cheek softly. “I’m so happy you’re okay, James.” He whispered into my hair. “Think about what I said, okay?”

“Okay,” I agreed. Abby waved goodbye to Noah before looping her arm through mine and walking up with me, helping me with my slight limp. My knees were killing me with the strain of the weight.

“I know this is a stupid question, but are you sure you’re okay?” She asked, helping me lie on my bed.

“As good as I could be in this situation. I’m just glad Noah got there before the guys did what they wanted. I can handle the arm for now.”

“James, are you okay enough for me to tell you about Landon?”

“What about Landon?”

“It’s...it’s not great news and I want to make sure you’re up for it.”

“Just, go ahead.” I said, just wanting it out of the way. Landon already told me he didn’t want me and there wasn’t much more that could hurt me. I was already at the point of no return.

“Landon, is moving to Kenya. He was offered a hospital position over there.”

“Oh….well, tell him congratulations.” I said, feeling the pang in my chest but holding back the tears.

“Con-…congratulations?” Abby looked beyond puzzled. “But James, you…you love my brother, don’t you?” I sat up and let out a sigh to try and ease the tightness in my chest.

“Yes, Abby. I love your brother very much. However, he made it quite clear earlier how he felt. If this is what he really wants Abby, who am I to stop him? He loves his career and if this is what will make him happy, then I support him.” I felt the tears begin to pool in my eyes as I struggled to hold them back. Abby wasn’t fooled though. She held me against her and ran her hands through my hair.

“It’s okay, James. I don’t know whatever he told you, but I know he loves you just as much as you love him. He’s just not making the best judgments right now. He’s confused and he’s not used to these kinds of feelings. It will dawn on him though, don’t worry. When it does, he’ll come running back, begging on his knees for you to take him back.”

“How long am I supposed to wait exactly?” I asked, a little angrily.

“I don’t mean it for you to wait. Do whatever makes you happy too. I’m just telling you that I know he feels the same way. Don’t let him fool you with whatever front he’s put up.” There was a moment of silence only broken by my occasional sniffles.

“What’s going on with Noah, now?”

“Oh, um…I guess I’m not completely sure. He said he has strong feelings for me and that he doesn’t want to just give up.”

“How do you feel about it?” She asked. I thought she would be biased, angry that I was still thinking of Noah, but she seemed genuinely curious and concerned. The only other person I’d ever felt this close to or trusted this much was Hollis.

“I care about Noah, I know I do.”

“But?”

“But, I don’t love him. Not like I love Landon.” Abby gave a sad smile. I cocked my head curiously and she shrugged.

“I’m happy and sad at the same time. Happy that my new best friend loves my brother. Sad that he’s making it so difficult for her.”

I laughed and shrugged as well. “I guess we’ll just have to see how it plays out.” Abby patted the pillow beside her and I laid back on it, gazing up at the spinning ceiling fan.

“Things will work out. Just wait and see.”

I closed my eyes slowly, welcoming the dark.

“I hope so.” 

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