I'd Be Lost Without My Blogger (Johnlock AU)

Nine

I want to ask him whether or not my thoughts are true but how do you ask someone who you just started talking with if they're into boys? So hey Sherlock, what's up with your sexuality? Do you like it in the ass? I can't just do that. He might like be giving more than receiving. Besides, I finally have a conversation going after all the awkwardness and I can't bullocks that up by asking if he's gay, or bisexual at the least, or not.

From: John

To Sherlock: Am I supposed to leave you alone now? I'm confused. X

I'm confused not only about what to do but also whether you are subtly trying to make clear that you're into boys. It makes my brain dizzy just thinking about it. Oh my gosh, imagine Sherlock Holmes, not only breaking girls' hearts but boys' hearts as well because he's dating me. Oh hell yes, I'm sorry for your poor hearts but if he's into boys, he is mine. Keep your claws off of him!

From: Sherlock

To John: Why? Sick of me already? You even sent only one x. I thought you liked me. :( xx

I can imagine his pouting lips, dark pink, moist and sad as he looks at his phone and it makes me cringe a little. I don't want my Sherlock being a sad puppy, his eyes look best when he smiles, I witnessed that today.

From: John

To Sherlock: Oh no I do like you! Sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you. I just thought that I should maybe leave you alone since you have rehearsals and all. Sorry. xxxxxxx

I seem to apologize a lot today, what is up with that? I should be too cool to apologize, swag and all that. Sherlock's reply came only a minute after I sent mine and it makes me wonder how busy the life of a hunky superstar actually is. He's always on his phone.

From: Sherlock

To John: Ha! I can't believe you fell for that. I teased you, I know you love me, you fanboy. Ha! I'm such a funny guy.

From: Sherlock

To John: Oh yeah, almost forgot: xxxx. Two more than usual for the teasing. Okay fine, here. x

He does know that x's stand for kisses right? Wait. He teased me? What an arse! Mycroft's arse and that's how big of an ass he is.

From: John

To Sherlock: You absolute dick. To make it up for the teasing, all the x's you sent, you must give real ones. And I don't mean the letter.

I hesitate as my thumb hovers over the send button. I am quite literally asking him for his kisses now. Oh what the heck, I already came out with him, flirted with him and called him names like sexy superstar so screw it all, I'm sending it.

It's about two hours later and he hasn't replied yet. Did I scare him off? Is he rehearsing? I'm suddenly scared that I messed it up. I'd understand because a guy can only take so much awkwardness a day. I just misread his signals, the words he sent didn't mean what I thought they meant. He just likes the letter x. I should've sent him Ss because that's my favorite letter. Damn fuck, shit I'm such a stupid wanker, oh my gosh I can't believe I thought that freaking Sherlock Holmes was flirting with me.

Hours go by slow tonight and I keep clicking the refresh button on Twitter. Maybe one of those update accounts knows where Sherlock is but there's nothing. Stupid update accounts stalking the boys' families. I don't care that Molly had a ladder in her leggings or that Greg's rumored girlfriend went out with her friends for coffee. Can't they keep track of their main objects of stalking? I huff at my screen, why am I even following them?