Insane Doesn't Even Begin to Cover It...

Insane Doesn't Even Begin to Cover It... chapter 33

When I’m done with the little video feed, meaning when it gets close to about an hour and thirty minutes that I’ve been on it, just looking at everything, I decide to stop and do the worksheet that Becca gave me. I take a pencil and look down at the questions.

How do you feel about going outside after watching the video feed?

After seeing that first question, I can already guess what the others are going to be like. I answer them honestly, and I’m done with it surprisingly quick, even though there were over 10 questions. It was almost like a little survey, not really a worksheet.

Once I’m done, I get up and walk over to Becca to give it to her. She takes it and smiles at me.

“Before you go, tell me what you thought of it, just your basic opinion.”

I write my answer down in my notebook and show her.

‘I thought it was cool. Being able to see all of that from a full 360, and up at a height where I can see off into the distance was really awesome. I think it might’ve changed some of my views on going outside but I haven’t really thought it fully through yet. Other than that, it was really good.’

She reads it and nods, “That makes sense. Well I’m glad you actually participated and didn’t just sit there and do nothing. Most of my other patients have all been so… stubborn. It’s a good thing that you’re at least willing to work on things.”

I nod and then wave goodbye, and leave her office. I can hear her moving around and doing things once I’m gone, but as soon as I’m up the stairs it’s all blocked out. Just as I get about halfway down the hallway, the bell for lunch rings.

I’m about to turn to go down the other stairs, to the first floor, when Griffin’s office door opens. Caden steps out, looking kind of pissed. Griffin is right behind him, with his hand on Caden’s shoulder. I watch as Caden yanks away from him and storms off down the hallway. Griffin goes back inside his office, slamming the door.

I’m guessing they must’ve had a fight or something, which isn’t good. He doesn’t seem to notice me at first, until he’s just about to run me over. I get ready to move out of the way but he stops a few inches in front of me, seeming really distracted.

“Hey.” He says, sounding agitated. “Let’s go to lunch.” He walks past me and down the stairs, leaving me there to follow after him. I do just that, walking slowly. I stare at him as he walks a few feet in front of me, almost speed walking to the cafeteria.

Once we’re sitting down with our food, I get the chance to examine him and see if there’s anything more wrong with him other than the fact that he just seems blatantly pissed. As I eat, I look at his face and his eyes, trying to pull something from them, some emotion.

It’s no use, however. He’s pretty good at keeping his expression blank, and he seems to know that I’m trying to figure out what’s wrong. There isn’t any hint of agitation anymore, just a blank bored expression. I sigh quietly and finish eating, and then head up to my room.

Caden follows me, surprisingly, and once we’re in my room, I decide to find out what’s up.

‘What’s wrong?’ I write and show him, and he shrugs.

“Just… nothing. I don’t know.” He sits down on my bed and I sit next to him.

‘Tell me, please?’ 

He looks at me, seeming a little unsure. I don’t know why he doesn’t want to tell me, he always tells me things. No matter what it is, I’m always the first to know, or at least I’m pretty sure.

“Okay… well… When I was in the meeting with Grifin, he started acting weird. He… was asking more about my drug problem, about how much I liked weed, things like that. How bad my addiction was. Finally, I got fed up and asked him what the hell was up. He didn’t answer me though and instead asked me if I wanted to do it again. Weed, I mean.”

He pauses for a second, looking away from me. When he starts talking again, he’s quiet.

“I flipped… I couldn’t believe he asked if I wanted to try smoking again when the last time I didn’t get my fix of whatever I was on, I killed my parents. I punched him and that’s where our meeting ended…”

I hurriedly write something down on my notebook and show him.

‘I’m so sorry. He’s a douche.’

That makes him smile a bit and he nods.

“This is true.” He says, and sighs. “I’m kind of tired, I think I’m going to take a nap. Want to take one with me?” He asks, and winks. That makes me blush a bright red and he grins. “I’m just kidding Sen, you can do whatever you want.” He gets up off my bed and goes over to the other one, lying down. He stares at me for a few minutes and then his eyes close, and he’s asleep.

I sit there and watch him for a minute, and just watching him is making me tired. Yawning, I lie down and start drifting off to sleep.

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I wake up at one point, when the dinner bell rings. Sitting up, I look over at Caden to see if he’s still there. Just as I thought he would be, he is, curled up on his side, facing the wall. I get up to go tell him it’s time for dinner, but when I get over there I just can’t do it. He’s fast asleep and I’d hate to wake him up.

Instead, I walk out of the room and down to the cafeteria, and grab my food. I eat quickly, and then get some food for him and take it up to my room. When I walk inside, I see that Caden isn’t asleep anymore, he’s sitting with his head in his hands, fingers entwined in his hair.

He picks his head up when I walk in and looks at the tray of food I’m holding in my hands, eyebrows slightly raised.

“That for me?” He asks, and I nod, holding it out to him. He takes it from me and puts the tray in his lap. “Thank you.” He says and I shrug, sitting back on my bed as he starts eating.

When he gets done, he puts the tray on the ground and then motions for me to come over to him. I blush a little and hesitate, shy.

“Aw, come on.” He says, patting the space next to him. Sighing, I get up and go over to sit next to him. As soon as I sit down, he grabs the fabric of my sweatpants and tugs at it, signaling for me to move closer. I do, and then our legs are touching.

Surprisingly, that doesn’t bother me. There’s no skin to skin contact, so I’m ok with it but I used to freak out if someone even touched me without cloth in between. I guess… I’m getting better…?

Hesitating, I lay my head down on his shoulder, keeping my skin away from his. His arm goes around my waist, and I blush.

As we sit there, Caden gradually leans us back until we’re up against the wall, almost snuggling together.

And, also surprisingly, that doesn’t bother me either.

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