Thomas Imagines | ✓

24.5 | is it just me?

I never thought the day would come.

He used to walk me home, to and from school. Now...well now I'm walking with someone else. Someone who I'm two months has been nice, and supportive. While he...well he hasn't.

Brett's hand rests on my back as I tripped and almost fell.

Although I've gotten used to his company and him always being around, I still get tingly when he's close to me. I always feel like he wants something that I can't give to him. Something that I've held onto for dear life.

He leans forward slightly, licking the bottom of his lips. And as lucky as I get, I know they've tastes they girls.

"Hey are you okay?" He asks as I pull away and start walking once more. I nod but don't look up. He sighs and puts his hands in his pockets. With two steps he's already caught up to me. "Is it just me or are you rejecting me?"

I feel the heat come to my cheeks as fast as they leave. I learned in the past month that with Brett I can be truthful, he accepts me the way I am. He respects me. Like a few weeks ago, when I had gotten drunk because of what Newt had said to me. I had walked to his house, arriving soaked in water and smelling of alcohol and a bunch of drugs (perks of having drug attics as parents). I had launched myself at him, something that makes him laugh every time. But he pulled away. I woke up the next day in his room while he had slept on be couch. His mom had arrived and changed me. I know embarrassing.

He respects me, and cares for me, but I just can't let myself fall again. I can't let myself believe I see something but it actually never happened.

"You could just talk to him," there it is again. The pain in his voice. "He'll want that."

I shake my head.

"You can't continue this," he grabs my arm making me stop walking. "Tomorrow. You, him, date."

I sigh for I know that whatever I do, this 'date' is happening.

•

So, first he took me to a park where we had our first date when we were two. He held my hand. But you knows what the funny things was?

I assumed that the day I finally went on a date with the bug what crush of my life is would feel something but I didn't. All the time I was thinking about Brett. How warm his side is when we cuddle watching tv—

"Hey," Newt scratches the back of his head and his cheeks stat turning a little pink. "I know that this is weird," ouch? "But I just want to tell you something: I haven't stopped thinking about you. This two months have been insane. Seeing you with him and whatnot, I just felt like you were not you anymore. You weren't mine."

"I was never yours," he rolls his eyes.

"No but you were my best friend."

"And that's all."

"Okay you're making this harder than it should be."

"This was a mistake." And I walk away.

I know leaving him is the highest blow to his ego, but how can I forgive him when he told the whole entire school about my experience at band camp? How I almost got my virginity taken away? That's humiliating! Two weeks and everyone made fun of me. Him included. I can't forgive him.

"Sorry Newt," I mumble to the air. "But I've moved on."

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬

The moment I see him, I lean forward. Pressing my lips against his, and it felt right.

"What about Newt?" He pulls away.

"What about him?" I ask as I look down at his soft lips.

"Y/n he's your crush not me," I pout. "Give him—"

"Don't," I say as I pull away further. "Brett, please don't."

"I'm sorry but—"

"But nothing, I like you and maybe because you always seemed so out of reach that I never really thought of it as true. Newt has always been there, but I've never been there for him. Not in the way I wanted it. But you..." He carcasses my cheek. "You...."

And it all goes away when our lips meet. Newt. My home. Everything but him.

Newt may have been a fantasy, but Brett is real. So real that for the past months I come to realize how good he is.

Newt was a crush. But Brett, gosh is it just me?

~
I know! Bad! I have to finish this book okay! Anyway, enter my contest and the last chapter will be posted after May 10. Also I apologize for grammar in this book, and specially here, I just wrote it right now.