Returning to school
after only
a few days off
still feels
just as abnormal
and counterintuitive
as it does
after a whole
summer away.
Disoriented
is the only real way
to describe me -
to describe the entire
student body,
really -
as we all walk in
the front doors
to the jarring tune of
the warning bell.
It's such a
strong feeling that
I can't help
but wonder if
there's something I'm missing...
But I just
put it down to
sleep deprivation
and let it be.
What that
something is
becomes all too apparent
later on
in the week.
When I walk into
my chemistry classroom
early Friday morning,
a bomb hits
in the form of:
"Exams
are coming up soon!
Who's ready?"
No one
raises their hand
in response to
the teacher's
overly peppy query.
Instead,
a collective groan
circulates through the class,
exacerbated when
the exam study sheets
begin their sweep
of the area.
This is probably
one of the two
most dreaded
times of the year
for me,
the other one being
the end-of-year finals.
And sure,
I'm almost certain
that any other highschooler
would say the same -
but unlike
quite a few of my
fellow students,
I absolutely
cannot handle
tests.
It's not even a matter
of simple dislike.
I do alright
with every other
aspect of my
school courses,
but when it comes
to testing
of any sort,
I am reduced
to a miserable,
anxious mess.
Maybe it's
a result of
the pressure
of being forced to answer
so many questions
from memory
in a limited amount of time,
or maybe it's
something else entirely,
but I have come
to dread
test days
and the horrid scores
that follow
more than anything else.
Exams,
of course,
are no better.
As the study sheet
makes its way into
my hands,
I can't help but
groan again,
a sentiment echoed by
many of my surrounding
classmates.
It's funny how
the only time I've ever
felt so connected to
any of them
is now, when we
are staring the exams
right in the face.
I can feel my heart
dropping down
into the soles of my shoes,
and in its place sprouts
a bundle of nerves,
anxious and
unsettled.
"Only three weeks
until the end of
the semester!"
the teacher crows
in a voice that makes me
want to slap the grin
off her face.
And then,
suddenly,
a thought strikes me
in just the same way:
I can't do badly
on these exams,
not this time.
This is my
junior year -
and it will
quite literally
ruin my chances
of getting into a nice college
if my grades fall
too low
as a result of these
asinine tests.
There is
no way
I can let myself fall
below my standards again.
A plan hits, then,
so quickly behind that
I wonder
how it hadn't been obvious
all along.
I can do this,
I tell myself.
I will
do this.
There is
no way
I will fail this time.
It's just a simple issue
of mind over matter.
With the right mindset,
you can do anything;
that's what my mother
has always taught me.
Your greatest enemy
is always yourself,
and if you can
overcome your own weaknesses,
you can do anything
and everything.
Or, at least,
I hope I can.
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I'm freaking out, guys. Misalignment is on the cusp of reaching 1K votes and 4K reads, and it just makes me really super happy - so thank you all so much!! It still just blows my mind that it's gotten so much support in less than two months. How does this happen? I still don't know. But I hope you guys enjoy the rest of the series every bit as much as this first book... Once I get the others written, of course.
If you guys liked this chapter, I would love if you would vote and leave me some feedback below c: It would be very much appreciated!
(Also, kind of random, but I love all you guys very, very much. Let me hug you all, please. Even if it's creepy that I'm being so overly emotional all of a sudden - let me hug all of youuuu--)
shit, Mack, stop being so weird;;;
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Misalignment | ✔
Teen Fiction"There are a million shades of grey between their black and their white - but no one ever cares to see them." In a world with a limited view of gender, Cam Shills struggles to come to terms with their identity as neither male nor female, a shade of...
