Sincerely, Aurora [completed]

~Sixteen~

Jude Christopher Brahm,

Can I just tell you how much I love you?

Yes? Okay.

I love you across the ocean, over the mountains, through the stars, and to the very bottom of the deepest crevice of the sea floor.

I love you with every cell that makes up me. With every hair on my head, and every pore in my skin. With every capillary, every vein, and every drop of blood.

If you put all of those numbers and distances together, that's almost an entire percent of how much I love you. And that's a lot.

Wake up so I can kiss you silly, okay?

~ ~ ~

I can remember one day that was almost as bad as the day we lost Emery.

It was two weeks after I'd been released from my two-day stay hospital. I was lying on my bed by myself, and I could hear you in the kitchen, making a snack or something.

Neither of my parents had been in to see me for a while. I didn't want to see anyone.

You peeked in through the door, a bowl in hand. "Can I come in?"

"Sure," I said, voice cracking.

I wasn't crying. I only cried at night, most of the time, but my voice always seemed more rough than usual.

You walked over to the bed and eased up beside me, resting one hand gently on my waist. "Do you need anything? Can I get you something?"

I swallowed a little. "Can you rub my back?"

You set down your bowl and nodded. "Of course. I have some ice cream, do you want any?"

I shook my head. "No."

Your hands were warm as you gently kneaded the muscles in my shoulders. But you didn't say anything. I don't think that you knew what to say to me, if you were to speak.

I shifted so that I was lying flat on my stomach and rested my face in my arms.

"Baby?" you asked softly, still rubbing my back.

"Yeah?"

"I don't want you to be in pain. I really want to help you."

I swallowed, sighed. "I'm fine."

"No, you're not. You're closed off from me." Your voice was soft, but I could feel the iron in it. The hurt.

Because it was true. I wasn't talking to you. I wasn't making any effort to make you feel wanted.

I was. You were. And both of us were suffering.

"Please don't shut me out," you said softly.

I closed my eyes and changed the subject altogether. "I can't stay here, Jude. I can't stay in this room, with my family, in this place. It's killing me."

You ducked your head, lowering yourself onto the bed next to me. "Traveling won't be fun while you're still sick."

"I'm not sick," I said, growing frustrated. "I'm caged."

You thought for a moment, absently running your fingers over my shoulder. "We could get an apartment."

"We need to do something."

You smiled at me, glasses slightly askew. "Do you like Fayetteville?"

I furrowed my brow, considering the city that was about an hour north of my old hometown. "I guess. It's a decent place."