Searching For Nothing

Chapter 5

Zayn's POV

I don't know why but I was in an extremely bad mood today, I just woke up like this and I did not want to put up with anything. Everyone and everything was getting on my last nerve, like when Uncle Louis beat me at Mario kart, or when Dad asked me to clear his plate for him. Normally these things would not bother me but today is just one of those days and I'm trying to steer clear of everyone to avoid conflict, but of course that only works for so long.

"Zayn come down here for a sec!" Dad yelled.

"No!"

"Zayn!!"

"Shut up!"

I heard pounding footsteps and then my door opened revealing Dad standing there.

"What did you say?"

"You're not deaf, I shouldn't have to repeat myself."

"Zayn cut the crap and get downstairs now."

"Fight me."

Dad rolled his eyes and grabbed me by the arm and started to drag me downstairs, I started screaming profanities and he just got a tighter grip on my arm. Once we got downstairs, Dad whispered something to each of the boys and dragged me into the car with my uncles following. I was in the very back by myself but I didn't mind, it gave me some time to cool off. I was very surprised that Dad wasn't giving me a lecture or yelling about being disrespectful, but who am I to complain about not being yelled at? I didn't even know where we were going but my questions were soon answered when we pulled up to a huge mall, my old foster family used to go to ones like this all the time, everyone got out of the car but no one had said a single word to me.

"Uncle Niall why are we here?"

Nothing, he just acted like no one was talking to him. Great I just love the silent treatment.

"Guys I'm just gonna go look around, text me when I need to be back at the car."

No one answered so I took that as a yes and went towards the door, I walked inside and first went to the pink berry because why not? I got blood orange yogurt with strawberries and mango on top and then made my way to the puppy store, I always felt bad for them being stuck in those small glass boxes all day. I was sitting down in front of one of the boxes keeping a small golden retriever company when I heard a voice behind me.

"Well if it isn't pipsqueak."

I turned around to be met with the face of my horrible ex-foster brother, Jake and all of his horrible friends.

"Oh Jake, hi."

"Long time no see huh?"

"Um yea," I said cowering away.

With one quick motion he grabbed me by my collar and swung me over his shoulder and took me outside where he threw me onto the cement.

"I can't believe you actually lived with this fat fag," Jake's friend said.

Jake laughed as he gave me a kick to the stomach.

"People like you don't deserve to be alive," Jake said.

Him and his friends took turns kicking me in the back and stomach while making fun of me for being gay, I wanted nothing more than to be with dad and my uncles.

"You are a mistake, being gay is a mistake, you are a broken waste of space, have fun rotting in hell!"

With that and a final kick to the stomach Jake and his friends were gone, I pulled myself up and the pain wasn't too bad, I mean it hurt but I could walk without people suspecting anything. I walked back to the car just in time to see everyone walking back also, I got in and sat in the back seat where everyone put their bags next to me but I didn't mind, I didn't even look up. I stayed silent the whole ride and waited until everyone was already inside before getting out of the car, I walked inside and went to my room and locked the door before taking off my shirt. I hissed as I looked in the mirror and poked the bruising on my torso, I couldn't stop thinking about what Jake had told me. "People like you don't deserve to be alive." If this is what I get for being who I am, then maybe that's not who I want to be anymore.

I pulled on my shirt and walked downstairs to the living room where Uncle Louis and Dad were both on their phones, I went to dad and sat next to him on the couch.

"Dad? Can I talk to you please?"

No answer, I quietly sighed and felt a tear fall from my face but I quickly wiped it away and went up to my room where I let everything out and sat in the corner of my room silently crying to myself.

*3 days later*

These past three days have been hell, no one has spoken to me but I haven't left my room to actually give people the chance, I usually ate and went to the bathroom when no one was home or at night when everyone was asleep. I was especially sore today so i went downstairs when I saw the cars gone in the driveway and grabbed a bag of ice from the freezer, I took off my shirt and hissed as the ice came into contact with my bruised torso.

"What are you doing?"

My eyes widened as I turned around to see none other than Uncle Louis whose eyes also widened when he saw my bruises.

"Zayn what the hell happened?"

Uncle Louis rushed towards me and took off the ice while inspecting every inch of my body.

"It's nothing."

"Zayn this isn't nothing."

"Why do you suddenly care anyways?"

"Zayn we just wanted you to know you can't disrespect us, we have always cared, especially your father, he hated doing this."

"I needed him the other day and he just ignored me!" I said as tears came to my eyes.

"Does this have something to do with what you wanted to tell him?"

I nodded as a couple tears fell down my cheek and Uncle Louis crouched down in front of me.

"My old foster brother was at the mall and him and his friends were all making fun of me for being gay, and they said people like me don't deserve to live and they have been texting me all the time and won't leave me alone, it hurts uncle Louis."

I started sobbing and uncle Louis pulled me into hug then picked me up and held ,e close to him.

"Zayn you listen to me and listen to me good, don't be ashamed of who you are, those boys are rotten and evil and you are absolutely perfect, I know what you're going through and the best thing I ever did was just ignore it and continue to be me and be happy."

"But didn't it hurt hearing all of those things?"

"It only hurts if you think about it, if you don't think about it it can't hurt you."

"I don't think I'm strong enough for that uncle Lou," I said as I rubbed my eyes.

"Are you kidding me? You're one of the strongest people I know, you're openly gay and at such a young age, it takes a lot of guts to do what you're doing, you will be just fine and if you feel like you aren't fine the rest of us are here to help you."

"Thanks uncle Lou."

"No problem, but we do need to tell your dad about this."

"Okay."

"Tell me about what?"

I looked over and Dad, Uncle Liam, and Uncle Niall were standing there with grocery bags and confused looks. Uncle Louis put me down which gave dad a full view of my tears and bruises making him run over and ask a billion and one questions.

"Who did this? When did this happen? Why didn't you tell me?"

"At the mall my old foster brother Jake and his friends did it, I tried to tell you but you weren't talking to me."

"Oh bub, I'm so sorry, I hated not talking to you, I just needed you to know that you can't talk to me like that, now why did those boys hurt you?"

"Cause I'm gay."

"I'm so sorry baby," dad whispered as he pulled me into a hug.

"It's not your fault, daddy."

"I love you so much Zayn, you're an amazing kid."

"I love you too."

"Now I have a phone call to make to a certain boys parents, you can hang out with your uncles."

I nodded and dad walked away leaving uncle Liam to pick me up because God forbid I ever walk in this house. I cuddled into uncle Liam's chest as he swayed from side to side and I fell into a soft sleep.