Hear me

Dream

"Coward, Traitor, Comrade Slayer!" the dragon hissed, his voice shaking the foundation of the ground beneath. "You will burn as she burned, and may you spend eternity with her screams!"

The dragon then opened his gaping maw and Laxus was consumed in flames.

Screaming himself hoarse, Laxus shot up in bed, sweat dripping down his bare back and chest. His heart hammered in his rib cage, not slowing until he took in the darkness of his bedroom and assured himself that he hadn't just witnessed some depraved version of himself murder Natsumi.

The blonde took several deep breaths, trying to come down from the dizzying adrenaline high that had come upon him as he relived his deepest regrets only meeting the barest hint of success.

He noticed he'd kicked his sheets into a tangled mess at the foot of the bed, half hanging onto the floor. From the scope of the nightmare, he was honestly surprised that he hadn't managed to inadvertently strangle himself while he'd been sleeping. Running a hand through limp, sweat soaked hair, he got up from the bed, knowing there wasn't a chance in hell he'd get any more sleep, even if he wanted to.

Stripping out of his sweats, he stumbled into the bathroom and turned the shower on the highest setting it would go. He embraced the feeling of the scalding water pelting his skin, but even the pain couldn't shake the afterimages of Natsumi's unseeing eyes boring into his from his mind. The lightning mage hastily scrubbed the sweat from his body, trying to think of something, anything, to distract him from the memory.

Deciding he couldn't stay in the stifling darkness of his apartment, Laxus hastily threw on whatever clothes his hands touched first and was out walking the street before he had time to think about it any further. Giving his body something physical to do usually helped him calm down, and tonight was no exception, the tension in his shoulders loosening as he made his way down the street, no specific destination in mind.

He wasn't sure why his dreams had decided to take such a morbid turn lately. He'd always had nightmares of his attempt to take over Fairy Tail, been haunted by the guilt of betraying his family and of nearly destroying his hometown. He'd thought he'd been doing a pretty good job of dealing with it, but he'd never been able to forgive himself for what he'd done to the little dragon slayer that day.

Logically he knew he was being ridiculous and that she could hold her own-and had. She and Gajeel had been the victors that day, even if had been due in part to his own inability to fully deploy Fairy Law. But he'd nearly killed her several times over, put her in bandages that nearly covered her from head to toe, and she'd smiled at him when he'd come back to the guild the day of his excommunication. She'd smiled like they were still friends. Like she'd forgiven him.

He felt nauseous as he ambled down the street, fist shoved in his pockets. He'd been so close to becoming the monster he'd seen in his dream. If Gajeel hadn't arrived when he did, he knew deep down that he would've killed her in his berserker rage and been forced to live with the consequences. He would've taken everything from her: her smile, her free will, her life, and it would've ended up killing him, too.

Even if he spent the rest of his life in service to Fairy Tail, he doubt he'd ever forgive himself for how close he'd come to being beyond redemption. He'd already betrayed her trust and her friendship, as well as the one promise he'd made to her when they'd both still been kids.

March 12, X778

Laxus cursed his grandfather for sending him out on babysitting duty. That pink-haired shrimp had only been at the guild for a few months and she managed to cause as much trouble as both the stripper kid and Erza combined. He thought it was stupid for him to have to go after her on a mission as inane as this. Finding a lost pet was literally child's play-perfect for her-and she'd even had that freaky cat thing she'd hatched along with her. But no. She'd managed to ruin both her first solo job and Laxus's evening simultaneously.