Queen One-Shots

Save The Badgers With Brian!

Do you suffer from crippling loneliness?

Is this loneliness caused from your lack of badgers?

Is this lack of badgers caused by culling?

WELL MY NAME IS BRIAN MAY AND I'M HERE TO HELP

Like yourself, I too was suffering from loneliness because I didn't have enough badger in my life

And then I discovered how much badgers mean to me

Badgers are the peanut butter to my jelly, the fruit to my loom, and the chicken to my nugget

Badgers are the reason I live

I love badgers, and I'm here to tell you that you should too!

Once I realized that my loneliness was caused by my lack of badgers, I knew I had to do something to get a little more badger in my life

So, I began to protest the cull of innocent badgers across the nation

Because I knew that if I needed more badgers, everyone needed more badgers

If you, my friend, are lacking badgers and always feeling lonely, then I have the program for you!

SAVE THE BADGERS WITH BRIAN!

Every month, you'll receive a magazine filled with all kinds of badger-y facts and all kinds of badger-y crafts!

You can also have the chance to join into the adopt-a-badger club! Where you can almost literally adopt a badger!

You can pledge money as well to help all of our little badger friends!

This program will help you satisfy your badger needs

Sign up now to join me, Dr. Brian May, to not only stop the cull of badgers, but also stop your loneliness because of your lack of badgers

Call now to receive a free set of poodle wigs

SAVE THE BADGERS WITH BRIAN!

"Because everyone needs a little more badger"

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