Our Love Story

Old habits

Warning high content ofSelf harm's present in this chapter.Read at your own risk.Possibly triggering.

"I'm getting bad again,but I'm too tired to care".

The rain was falling gently through my window just like the tears streaming down my face. The wind raging just like my emotions.

I walked slowly towards my bed and took up my jewel box.
I took out the razor cut my wrist.
One cut,two,three,six and I lost count from there.
I was now lying on the floor my hands trembling the tears still coming with a pounding headache. I closed my eyes and I felt nothing,no emotions, no feelings, I just felt numb.

The blood was dripping from my wrists,probably staining my dress but I could really careless about that.

I started cutting after the accident, because my parents and everyone around me thought I wasn't good enough and they were right, I wasn't.

Then my parents started hating me,I lost my sister and I lost myself.
I honestly don't know if I know who I am anymore.

I stopped cutting for about two months,and now I'm back at it.
But I do get help from my Guidance Counselor,Ms Smith. How disappointed Ms Smith is going to be when I tell her I've started again.

I got up slowly feeling a little dizzy and staggered toward my bathroom.

I took a cold shower and cleans my cuts.
After my shower I got in my queen-sized bed and drift to bed.

The Next Day.

I got up in the morning only to see that I was late for school.

I took a quick shower and curled my hair.

I put on a white emoji long-sleevd sweater with matching joggers and a white air max.
I put on light makeup and got my bag.

I rushed downstairs then last night's memories came rushing back: when my parents were rude to Tyler,me telling him I love him,him telling me he loved me back,me arguing, me cutting.

I sighed then pulled down the sleeves of my sweater.

I said good morning to my parents then I was out. I didn't even asked them for the keys to my car.

As I stepped outside I saw Tyler waiting for me across the road with two cups if coffee in his hand. He was dressed like a business man,then realization hit me and I mentally face palmed. He has a job now.

I dashed across the street and headed for Tyler.I caught up with him panting and out of of breath.

"Hey Tyler with Starbucks latte"I said.
"Hey Jessica,oh and Starbucks had new flavors so I decided to try both French vanilla and my original coffee"Tyler said sarcastically.
I gave him a what the hell look and he said"but I know that Jess lives on lattes with croissants in the morning so I had to buy for her too"he said.
My heart leapt,he isn't only cute but he also brings me food,lord help me now.
I know I was smiling like a dufus but I really didn't care right now.

I took the bag and the coffee and stated sipping on the sweet,hot,creamy liquid in my cup.

We started walking in the direction of my school.
"So you excited about your first day of work?"I asked trying to make conversation.

"Totally,I can't wait"Tyler said with enthusiasm.I smiled knowingly.

"So,interesting dinner last night right?"Tyler said.
"I'm so sorry for the way my parents treated you" I said sincerely.

"Its ok babe and as long as I got you"Tyler said.
My heart did backflips and we walked hand I hand to my school gate.
He kissed me on my cheek and said"I'll be waiting for you after school".
I touched the part where he just kissed and went in school smiling for the first time in a long time after such a rough night.