Helpline: An Agony Aunt Advice Book

Entry 13: Acquaintance crushes

Anonymous reader...

So I've liked this guy for over 5 months, and I've known him for 3 years. We're not great friends, more good acquaintances, we're close enough. We know little things about each other, we work together in chemistry sometimes, we joke around, and when we had social dance in PE we always went with each other as partners. My issue is, how do I tell him I like him? We are never alone together, and I don't have his number. How should I do this?

It seems that you know this guy rather well, and are comfortable around him. This would bode well if you were to have this hypothetical relationship; being relaxed, laughing around and working together are good signs.

The way I see it, what you need to do first is get his number. BE SUBTLE- if you were to outright ask him for his number, he may feel overwhelmed. That would not end so well... What I'd advise is that you slide the subject into the conversation. I'm not sure how successful you may or may not be with this, but just get the ball rolling. Loosen any tension you may have and then ask him. Preferably when he has just been laughing or smiling, because this is obviously the time when he'll be more lenient to parting his contact details.

I'd then wait a while before you make your move, otherwise it'll be obvious you only wanted his number because you like him. The key to everything is subtlety. I wouldn't approach him through text- believe me, if he happens to say no, you won't want anything that could possibly come back to haunt you. What you should do is tell him face to face. Not only will it be untraceable through lack of evidence, but you will get a honest answer. His eyes won't be able to lie like his texts can. There is only so much a human's expression can hide.

I know you said you are never alone together- organize time! Ask him if he could tutor you with chemistry or something. Just make sure that no one else is within earshot, for obvious reasons. But the confession will be by far the most difficult to get through. It'd be best if you were to say everything there and then, let it all into the open for him to digest. Give him time if he seems overwhelmed- don't pressure or guilt trip him.

Overall, simply be confident. If he does end up saying no, his loss. There should be no reason for you to feel at fault because you were truthful. And if he becomes a huge jerkwad and disowns you as an acquaintance, then he wasn't worthy of your admiration anyway. You deserve better than that.

Obviously, I am no relationship expert with a total of zero of them to my name, but I still feel as if I can give half useful advice. The main thing you must remember is subtly- you wouldn't believe how far someone will run when they feel even the slightest bit overwhelmed.

From ciaramaeflower

Xxx