I Swore I'd Be Just Fine When You're Gone. (Jaime Preciado)

I'm not okay

Allie's POV~

Today was going to be interesting...my nerves were in a fit, I hadn't seen him for three years. What if things were completely different? Get your head on straight Allie, of course they would be. You up and left mere months before your wedding.

I sighed and made myself get off the couch, if I didn't start the day now, I'd never convince myself to get up. After taking a scolding hot shower and throwing on some blue jean skinnies and a striped sweater I went to wake up Kota. She didn't know what we were doing today, she just thought we were going out of town and knew we might see Vic. That wasn't a lie, I'd be staying in San Diego over night, I knew I'd end up seeing them all. I hoped I would at least.

She grumbled and rubbed her eyes when I started shaking her shoulder to wake her up. She was like Jaime in this respect too, almost impossible to wake up before noon. So now, at a quarter to eight, was completely unacceptable. Oh well, she'd get over it in a few hours. "Wake up baby, we gotta get going." I said, yawning myself. My shower hadn't woken me up like I'd hoped.

"I'm hungry." She complained from the backseat. We hadn't been driving for ten minutes. "Can we go to McDonald's?" I sighed, she was relentless, there was no way I'd make it out of town without going to McDonald's. So after a quick run through the drive through she was quiet and happy until we reached the airport. She had never been on a plane...this would be an adventure.

"But Mama." She said with an exasperated sigh. I had made the mistake of telling her that her ears would feel funny when we took off, and now she wouldn't stop complaining about them hurting...even though we hadn't left the ground yet. I couldn't help but think about my first plane ride, I hated it.

***Flashback 7 years***

"Jaime. Jaime. Jaime. Jaimeeee!" I whined from my window seat. Why did I insist on sitting by the window? I hated heights and now I'd just get to see how high we were headed. I didn't want to fly. I didn't want to fly at all.

"Babe, calm down before you break my fingers." Jaime whispered with a laugh. I hadn't even noticed it was his hand I was squeezing the life out of until then. I let go quickly, thinking about how much Vic would yell at me if I broke his bass player, and closed my eyes. Trying to calm down, and failing horribly. "It's only bad for a minute."

"We're gonna die. We're soooo gonna die." I said with a moan. I had never ridden on a plane for a reason. I knew I wouldn't be able to handle it. "Quit laughing at me!" I roughly whispered, blindly hitting Jaime as I heard him chuckling in the seat next to me. "I'm honestly worried about our lives and you're laughing at me. You dick." I muttered while he laughed harder.

"We aren't gonna die." He said, catching his breath. "You're way to paranoid." He finished with a head shake. Yes, I am paranoid. I told him I didn't want to fly, what does he do? Gets me on a plane the very next day. We weren't even going anywhere significant! We were just 'conquering my fears' no thanks.

"I can't believe you're making me do this." I said as I felt the turbulence start up. "Oh my earsssss." I moaned, grasping his hand and flinching my eyes closed as hard as possible. This was awful. I never wanted to fly again.

"Babe." I heard him whisper, but was ignoring him, trying to focus on the idea of ground. "Baby." I just shook my head, my eyes still shut tightly. "Allie."

"What?" I snapped with a shaky breath. I guess I had been like that for a while.

"We've landed." He said chuckling. How had I not noticed we were no longer moving? That was easily the fastest thirty minutes of my life.

"Ugh. Good. Let's go." I said getting up and walking off without him. I couldn't believe he put me through this. I wasn't going to talk to him for the rest of the day.

***End of flashback***

I chuckled at the memory. I had stopped being mad at him about ten minutes after we left the airport considering he'd only buy me coffee if I talked to him. It really had worked though, conquering my fears. I had never had an issue on airplanes since.

"It's only bad for a minute." I said, squeezing Kota's hand reassuringly. "Then you don't notice a thing." I added, shrugging.

"How do you know?" She asked with a fearful sigh. I could still hear the sassy tone coming through though.

"Because that's what your daddy told me the first time I got on a plane, and he was right. It's not that bad." I said nodding, she had turned to look at me when I said 'your daddy'.

"Is that where we're going mama?" How did she get so smart? I would have never figured these things out as a kid. I smiled faintly and nodded. "Yay!" She cheered, grinning. I really hoped everything would go okay today. I knew Jaime, he would want to stick around, be a dad. Although I knew the old Jaime. What if he had changed?

I shook my head and closed my eyes as we started to take off, patting Kota's hand with the hand that wasn't being squeezed to death. "See, it's better." I whispered once we were smoothly in the air.

"You were right." She said with a nod. "It's not that bad very long." She said smiling. I smiled back and she watched out the window the rest of the flight. Much unlike Jaime, he'd talk your ear off in a plane even more so than a car. Even if you gave him an iPod or DVD player, nope, he'd still talk.

When we landed I checked my phone, Vic was supposed to pick us up, but I didn't see him anywhere. The text I had from him explained why that was.

Matt needed me for something at an ungodly hour this morning and I'm still stuck here. Jaime offered to pick you up though, so he should be there...I hope.-V

Lovely. He 'hoped' because Jaime had a tendency of forgetting to pick people up. Always had. I didn't really want them to meet in an airport but oh well. Better sooner than later?

"Allie!" I heard a familiar voice yell as I started looking around. I couldn't help but smile when I turned in the direction of the voice and saw the hedgehog haired boy smiling at me, showing off the dimples I had always loved so much.

"Hi..." I said with a nervous smile as I reached him, an out cold Kota on my arm. She had fallen asleep about fifteen minutes before we landed, and there was no waking her up.

"Hey." He said, giving a more confident smile back. That's the Jaime I know and love, always taking the awkwardness out of situations. A gift I sadly lacked. "This must be her." He said nodding towards Kota with a soft smile.

I nodded, smiling back. "This is her. She's unconscious at the moment, sorry." I said with a quiet chuckle. He shrugged with a smile and picked up our two bags, leading the way out to his car.

I hadn't thought to bring her carseat, so I just sat her on my lap, strapping the seatbelt over us both. If he still lived in the same place, which I assumed he did considering he hated moving with a burning passion, it was only about a five minute drive anyway.