I Swore I'd Be Just Fine When You're Gone. (Jaime Preciado)

I can't do this on my own

Allie's POV~

I sat at the breakfast bar in our kitchen and stared at my phone. I knew Vic was right. I knew I needed to talk to him. Tell him. He had a right to know....he had that right three years ago but I took it away. What if he hated me for it? I let out a frustrated sigh and threw my phone at the couch. I didn't know what to say. How would I start that conversation? "Oh yeah hi it's your ex, yeah the one who randomly took off after six years of being together, two months before our wedding. Oh, and by the way, I have a kid now. And she's yours." Yeah, that would go over fantastically. Maybe I should just start with small talk and lead up to that? Ugh. I didn't want to text him. He probably wouldn't text me back anyway.

I saw the time on the stove and ran out to my car. I was late picking Kota up from her play date. I wonder how much easier this parenting thing would be if Jaime was around. I wondered if he'd help. Of course he would, he'd be a great dad. When he was home. 

"I'm sorry, again." I said to Kota's friend, Lila's, mom. I was always late, but today I was very late. She shook her head and told me it was no problem, leading us to the door. "Did you have fun today?" I asked as Kota took my hand and walked to the car with me.

"Mhm." She said nodding. "Hey mama?" She asked, looking up. I looked back at her, waiting for the question. "Why don't I have a daddy like Lila does?" I froze. She had never really asked anything like that before. She knew Kyle wasn't her dad, but she never asked who was. "Mama?" She said pulling on my hand. 

Don't lie to her, Allie. Don't you do it, you're already lying to everyone else. I chewed on my lip and led her to the car. "You do baby." I said with a sigh. I had to tell her. I knew Vic wasn't going to let me procrastinate telling him that long, so I better tell her the truth about it now. "He's Vic's friend. He doesn't know about you though..."

"How come?" She asked tilting her head as I got in the drivers seat.

I glanced at her in the mirror, "Because mama didn't tell him." She looked to be mixed with confusion and hurt. "He will though baby, I'll tell him soon, very soon. I promise." I said glancing at my phone. I'd call him tonight. I couldn't put it off now. She just sighed and looked out her window at the trees passing by. I'm a bad person.

I stepped onto the back patio and clicked call. She was inside watching Shrek and should be good for a while. I didn't know if I wanted him to pick up or not. Maybe leaving a message would be better. No...it would be worse, then I'd die of anticipation. What if I left a message and he never called back because he had no desire to talk to me? Then he'd have my number and wouldn't answer either. Vic wouldn't let him do that right? He'd make him talk to me long enough to find out about Kota I'd hope.

After about ten rings I heard his voice pick up, "Hello?" He asked, clearly a little confused as to who this unknown number was calling. At least that meant he didn't know Vic had been in contact with me, so he didn't spill the beans. That's good. I think.

"Hey Jaime...it's uh, it's Allie." I said sitting down. I suddenly felt very sick to my stomach.

"Oh...um hi." He said slowly, probably a little shocked at me calling. I was shocked I was calling. "How've you been...?" He sounded like he was questioning if he should have even asked that question.

"I've been better." I said truthfully. "And yourself?" I asked, looking up at the clouds. It looked like it was going to rain again. Lovely.

"I've been..." He started to say great but stopped. "I've been better," He said with a weak chuckle. I'm sure he has, me calling probably ruined the whole week. "What is it Al? Why'd you call?" I sighed as he used my nickname. I never let anyone else call me that because it was a boys name. Jaime used to tell me he didn't give a fuck and was going to call me that anyway because it was cute.

"I need to tell you something...and I don't know how to say it, or how you're going to take it...but I have to tell you..." I said with a shaky voice.

"Just say it. It's okay." He said with a careless voice. He didn't think it was anything big. Boy was he in for a surprise.

"I uhm....I wanted to tell you why I left. The real reason..." I took in a deep breath and just let it out, "I was pregnant Jaime. You have a three year old daughter." And then, silence.

Jaime's POV~

"You've been weird lately." Tony said to Vic with an eyebrow raised. He had, very strange. Secretive almost. Vic was never like that. I looked up from my phone to Vic, waiting for him to say something.

"Have not." He muttered before walking out. I just shook my head and went back to what I was doing on my phone.

"Probably something to do with Allie. He's been weird since the airport." Mike said from the floor where he was playing video games. He was right. Just as I was about to go find Vic and question farther my phone rang.

"Hello?" I asked crinkling my eyebrows. It was from an unknown number with a weird area code.

"Hey Jaime...it's uh, it's Allie." I froze. She was really calling me? After over three years, and then the airport, she was calling me?'

"Oh...um hi." I said slowly. I think I was probably in shock. "How've you been...?" I didn't know what to say. What do you say to someone like this? Someone you've been in love with for about a decade, when I'm not supposed to be anymore. Yeah, cause that's possible.

"I've been better." She said sighing. "And yourself?" What was with all this small talk? There had to have been a reason she was calling. She didn't just wake up and decide she missed me.

"I've been..." Don't say great. You aren't great. You just want everyone to think that. Not Allie though, she should know you're not great, considering it's her fault. Sure I have a girlfriend, but I'm not great. "I've been better." I answered with a light chuckle. "What is it Al? Why'd you call?" I asked, wanting to get to the point.

"I need to tell you something...and I don't know how to say it, or how you're going to take it...but I have to tell you..." That didn't sound good...

"Just say it. It's okay." It can't be anything extreme, right? Probably no big deal at all.

"I uhm....I wanted to tell you why I left. The real reason...I was pregnant Jaime. You have a three year old daughter." I froze. I had a kid? And she felt like she had to leave because of it? Did she think I wouldn't want my own child?

"I want to see her." I had missed three years apparently. I didn't want to miss another day.

"I figured you'd say that...maybe we could meet tomorrow?" She asked nervously.

"Yeah, that sounds good...can you come here maybe?" She said a quick yes and I smiled. "Great. I'll see you then Al." I heard her grumble at the nickname. "I'm always gonna call you that, get over yourself." I said smirking.

"I hate you." She said with a laugh. I laughed with her, it was nice, almost like old times. I missed this relationship. The bitchy one I was in right now could never compare. Nothing could compare really.

"So you knew?" I asked Vic as I walked into the kitchen where he was sitting. "About Kota?" He looked up and sighed. "Don't apologize it's okay." I said sighing while sitting down.

"She promised she'd tell, if she didn't soon I was going too, I promise." He said while I nodded. "She's almost just like you man." I chuckled.

"I'm meeting her tomorrow. I'm excited. Nervous, but excited too meet her. My daughter. God that's weird to say." I said smiling.

"You'll be good at this dad stuff." He said patting me on the back with a smile before walking off. I sure hoped he was right.

A/N: Thank you all so much for the comments! Keep them coming, they make me want to update fast.:) I love you all.<3 What do you think about the story so far?