Not Nearly Metta

Nicole

         What’s wrong Nikki” Lela asked over the phone. “Trevor and I broke up. I caught him cheating on me” I said trying to hold back my tears. “Who is Trevor” Lela asked. “My baby daddy” I answered. “Baby daddy what do you mean baby daddy, Nicole your pregnant” Lela asked. We talked all the time and I never once mention that I was pregnant and there is more that she doesn’t know.  “Nicole do you hear me” Lela shouted into the phone. “Mom kicked me out when she found out I was pregnant. She saw the pregnancy test in the trash can” I said. “Where are you now I can send you some money and you know you can always stay with grand ma and pa? They left our room the same” Lela suggested. “Lee I’m not in California I’m in Alabama” I said. That was the other part of the big news I never told her I was in Alabama or that I was pregnant. It wasn’t hard to hide since Lela and our mother didn’t get alone so she never called the house only my cell phone. “WHAT how could you not tell me we talk damn there every day? How long have you been out there, how far along pregnant are you, what else are you not telling me” Lela asked never stopping to take a breath let alone let me answer a question. “I’m 3 months now and when mama kicked me out a little over a month ago Trevor and I moved here, where he start working with his uncle who helped us get a place of our own” I explained. “Why didn’t you tell me Nikki” she asked in a softer voice. “I don’t know I guess I just wanted to do it on my own and maybe I was a little embarrassed too. But now I know I was just being stupid” I said as a tear slide down my face. “No Nikki you are not stupid, I can respect the fact that you wanted to handle this on your own. And you should never be embarrassed to tell me anything I love you no matter what” Lela said. “I love you too Lee” I said now crying. “Don’t cry Nikki we are going to handle this together” she said. I didn’t say anything I just silently cried. “Nikki text me your location I’m on my way right now” she said. I could hear her making a lot of noise. Then I heard her door slam close and then lock.

         Three hours later she arrived at the house. As soon as she walked in we hugged. I missed her more than I thought we haven’t seen each other in months or it could be that I was overwhelmed with emotions from the night. “Alright Nicole tell me what happened” Lela asked. “You want the long or short version” I asked with a slight smirk. “Long tell me everything” she said. “We’ll let me take something out the freezer then” I said walking to the refrigerator. “How about we go out and you can tell me all about it” she suggested. I gathered my things and we left.

         “I came home after work and I heard these weird noises coming from the room. I pushed the door all the way open and he was there with one of my co-workers fucking in our bed. I slapped her and started after him. I went back in forth fighting both of them as they ran around the room naked. I went into the kitchen and grabbed a knife and told them to get out of my house” I explained as Lela listened she never really blinked. After I finish explaining what happen she started laughing. “What the hell is so funny” I asked not seeing the humor in what happen. “So they are running around Alabama butt ass naked” she asked. “Yea” I said laughing never noticing that I did kick them out just like that. “Lela there’s more. The house lease is under his name and his uncle so I don’t have any rights to the apartment” I added. “Don’t worry we will get through this together. I’ll put you up in a motel for the time being until we can find a place” Lela said. “We” I asked. “I had a lot of thinking on the drive here and since your down here, you have a job and your pregnant this is where I need to be. My semester is almost over so I can transfer to a school out here to help you out next semester” she said. “Lela what about Clark” I asked feeling sad. “What about it you are blood, school is a school” she said grabbing my hand. Lela was always there to bail me out of trouble growing up. She was more of a mother figure to me then our own mother was but she made sure I acknowledge Sylvia as our mother and her as my big sister. We had a rough child hood we mostly Lela. She use to shield me from the beatings our mother boy friend’s would give us when they came home drunk or lost a bet on a game. We were their punching bag and after the last boyfriend put Lela in the hospital our grandparents took us in. I went back in forth with staying with my grandparents and my mother. My mother was always gone so I had the house to myself.

        I went back in forth between houses until one of my mother boyfriends tried to rap me. When I told Lela I saw another side of her that I don’t think either of us new existed. She went crazy and beat the shit out of him with anything she could pick up. My mother got home and saw Lela fighting with him and she came in and pushed her off of him. I was shocked that my other would take his side even though I knew it shouldn’t have shocked me since she would just sit by and watch them abuse us. Lela screamed out to her that he was trying to rap me and my mother slapped her down to the floor. I was scared that she was going to beat mama like she did the man. That man was not little at all he was big with a mouth full of gold and he had a short temper. But she just stood there with her fist balled uptight. Then my mother said “you think someone will want you are your sister. Just look at you, your ugly and stupid. You don’t have shit and will never be shit”. Lela just stood there with her fist balled up one tear fail and she grabbed my arm and led me out the house. She then turned to me and said “Don’t you ever go back to that damn house or I will kick your ass my damn self. Mama doesn’t care for anyone but her damn self so fuck her”. I was so scared I agreed and never went back to her house until I graduated from high school. At that time I was in the 6th grade and Lela was in the 8th.  Lela would not let my mother contact us or come by our grandparents house she threaten to call the police on her and her boy friend’s who were all into drugs so it kept her away.

    After we finished talking Lela and I went to the house and got as much as my things as we could and check into a motel. She left early in the morning to head back to Georgia I know she was tired from going back and forth with little sleep. I felt guilty because she was finally living her own life and I pulled her back in to save me.