I can't believe what just happened. Not many people know I have sever panic attacks, it's just something I don't like to share, but what was so amazing is that Justin is the only person who could calm me down that quickly. Not even Dylan or my parents could do that. I wasn't talking to Justin because I didn't know what to say. One I haven't had an attack in a while so it took me by surprise, I'm in shock mode, and two I couldn't believe how quickly he calmed me down. It just blew my mind. It made me feel even better knowing that I was going to bed with Justin because I know if I wasn't, I wouldn't be able to go to sleep. We walked into Justin's room after I went to get some clothes, and we started to change. He took off his shirt and it was the first time I noticed his six pack. Damn. I couldn't keep my eyes off of him but as soon as he turned around I ran to the bathroom. I finished changing and when I came out Justin was in bed patting the empty spot next to him, motioning me to lay down. When I got into bed he put his arm around me and I laid my head on his chest.
"Melanie, what happened today?"
I was contemplating telling him or not because in my experiences guys get scared when they find out I have problems, but I had a feeling that Justin was different. "The truth is I have severe panic attacks and I never really know when they come. I start breathing heavily because I feel like the air is being sucked out of me, my stomach starts hurting, it feels like someone keeps punching me over and over, and I usually scream because I feel everything closing in on me. Sometimes I don't even remember what happens. Once I had a panic attack and when it was over I still couldn't breath, I ended up fainting and I had to stay in the hospital for two nights. Justin I have problems some that I don't want to talk about right now, but I feel that if we get serious I'll be too much for you to handle."
"Mel don't worry about that. If we have any obstacles along the way we'll get through them together."
"Okayyyy..."
"You need to relax after today. Lets get some sleep. Good night babe."
"Good night."
