Lance and I are at the point in our friendship where we hang out separate from Tamara. Tamara and Lance have always had their separate friendship which i've respected and not intruded. Lance and I made plans to go to Gov Ball to see our idol Kanye West and Tamara got upset to learn we were going with out her. It's not out of anger but she's such a ball of negative energy, hates crowds and doesn't care for Kanye so why should she go?
Today Lance and I made plans to smoke at Ikea, eat some food and just chill. I brought my weed and bowl to school and we kept if secret because we didn't want Tamara to invite herself or rub it in her face. After school she interrogates us about it and then finds out and has a bitch attack. The thing is she's not mad at Lance, she's mad at me. The only reason is that she can push me around but not Lance. After she found out she stormed out and said "have fun" super passively. We found her at the train station and she refused to talk to me. What a cunt.
Lane and I went to Red Hook. He bought a lighter and then we smoked at the pier in my bowl that I stole from Tamara. We went inside the ate meatballs super high and it was so funny we couldn't stop laughing. Then we went to all the showrooms and laughed, bought some hot dos and then got on the ferry. At the ferry we got on top of the boat at sunset and we were the only people there. We were just laughing and screaming and put on the Kanye album at the same time and danced until we landed in the pier. After that the weed started to wear off and we calmed down and then walked silently to the train. He hugged me and I went home.
That moment on the boat was a moment i'll remember for the rest of my life. It was key essential moment to my youth, something I feel i'll remember on my death bed. Just eh pure innocent of approaching the manhattan skyline at sunset, listening to music with him dancing and not caring and my cheeks hurt from smiling and I was tearing up and just loving life. It was so beautiful This is the Casablanca year! This is the essence! The romantic! The emotional! Not romantic like love but the greatness of nature and beauty and truth!
Today at school we learned about the absurd's definition of the meaning of life. To be happy in life you must give up hope and take life as it come, accepting whatever happens. I felt that today. I just did it and it was beautiful. I love Lance, not in a romantic way but as a friend. Sometimes I feel he filled the Gabriel void in my heart and he's a wonderful person. He makes me terribly happy and I can't stop laughing when I'm with him! What a lovely day!
* Also other news: Sophie(Sarah?) cheated on Alex with Arnold but Hannah's also been fucking Arnold. They don't know. Also Hannah says she likes driving Sarah crazy. And Gina said to Alex that Hannah is stalking her.
YOU ARE READING
My First Journal
Non-FictionALL THINGS THAT HAPPENED ARE REAL. THIS IS NOT FICTION. A diary documenting my final year of high school. Recently life has become this very strange television like reality for me. I went from invisible to involved. This is an entirely true account...
