before i go 》tronnor au

eleven

fixed
3|01|16
word count: 952

i didn't sleep that night. i was so heartbroken, i mean i loved troye.

i loved how he would sing to me and buy me flowers. and how he would run his fingers through my hair and tweet me. he was my model and he bought me red candy (my favorites). we shared so many laughs and both agreed that two is better than one. he was always jealous of my photography skills and how i could come up with a comeback in seconds. he cuddled me and gave me forehead kisses, which were the absolute best. he got along well with my family and focused on the doctor when he talked about me. troye loved to make eye contact, making his blue eyes meet my green ones. i am in love with troye mellet.

obviously, he didn't feel the same way.

troye and tyler had a 'thing' in 2013-2015 but, the confirmed their brake up. that was clearly a lie.

it broke my heart to throw him out of the hospital, and even worse to listen to his voicemails, decline his calls, and read his text messages. he even took it to twitter, knowing i had his notifications on. i turned them off.

i wanted nothing to do with him. yet, i missed him so much. i missed his warmth and his voice and his cheesy pickup lines.

my cancer is getting worse, filling my lungs. they keep predicting my lifespan is getting shorter and shorter with every breath i take.

these past few weeks, all i seem to do is cry. how many stupid tears can i cry, like seriously? it seems like something is going wrong every second.

troye is still in minnesota, though. he's staying at the hotel that is down the block from the hospital. i know this only because andrea payed him a little visit. i won't go into detail, but she wasn't happy and by the time she left his room, he probably wasn't either.

i looked down at my toes, wriggling them. i smiled at the sight, i'm dying but i am still alive. right now, i'm breathing. after everything i've gone through—and continue to—i'm still here.

"you alright, connor?" my nurse, grace helbig, said as she entered the room with my breakfast and pills. "you seem a little blue."

i looked up at her, giving her a soft smile. "you've probably heard of the whole troye thing by now. thanks for the... uh food, by the way."

she nodded, placing the tray on my legs. i looked at the small breakfast; cheerios, strawberries, and water with eight pills (they added one for the worsening cancer).

i ate my breakfast quickly, which grace scolded me for. troye called again and andrea came to visit with our other friends kian and jc. ricky also tagged along but only stayed for a bit, he had a tennis tournament.

-

troye called for the sixth time today and with the great advice from my older brother, dustin, i decided to answer.

"what?" i sassed, as soon as i accepted the call. i wanted to speak to him so badly, yet we weren't going to discuss that.

i could hear the frown on his face. he sobbed, "connor, please forgive me. it wasn't what it looked lik—"

i cut him off, brutally. "no, troye. you were cheating on me. it's exactly what it looked like."

"connor, can i ever make it up to you? i dumped tyler. you mean so much more and i was too stupid to even see that we are perfect. i need you in my life, please. connor, i love you."

"come to the hospital at eight o'clock on the dot. one minute before or later will not be acceptable. i will have mr. graceffa let you in and up to my room. he is the one with the green eyes and brown quiff, facial hair and he's very...built. you have one chance, don't screw up," i instructed firmly.

troye agreed and we said goodbye, well he said goodbye. i was too mad.

"joey?" i called out, hoping he'd hear. i mean he was often with his boyfriend, daniel or spending time with his dogs or working out.

i like to think of joey as my bodyguard but he's just an extra assistant/security guard for me.

joey and daniel entered holding hands. they were totally in love. and did the dirty anywhere in public, which conveniently included my bathroom.

"yes, connor?" he asked calmly.

i requested, "let troye in at eight o'clock on the dot and lead him up. don't leave though. please."

they both cautiously looked at me, questioning my decision.

"you sure 'bout that, bud?" daniel asked as he patted my knee.

i nodded slightly, now questioning  if i was right to give troye another chance. i shook the thought out of my head, of course it was a good idea.

-

i looked up from my phone to see troye entered the room, followed closely by joey. troye ran quickly to my bed, wrapping me in his arms.

god, i missed this. i pulled my arms around his body.

"troye," i breathed into his shirt. i felt his warmth that i missed so much. i smelt his signature scent and i breathed pure troye.

what more could i ask for right now?

a/n: yes it is up late. yes it is a bit short. yes i decided to pity you because of the last chapter. and yes i am obsessed with shipsstuff and her stories, go do yourself a favor and read. love you, ky!

see you tomorrow loves!

rylee

♥︎