Why?: A Look Inside My Mind

Saturday, February 6, 2016

You done fucked up.

You're going to tell me you 'tried'?! That when you were grabbing my hips and grinding into me, you were trying to fix it?! That's BULLSHIT! You were just trying to get into my pants. And me, being the naïve little girl I am, let you.

You told me once that you weren't using me, but again: BULLSHIT! We're not together but you touch me and feel me up like we were, then you get mad when I break down. Explain that to me please?

How DARE you get mad at me for telling her?! I'm sorry I'm not like you, who can bottle everything up and not talk about it. Unlike you, I don't like anxiety. I don't like getting panic attacks. And keeping this to myself will give me anxiety. She's not the one who's at fault here. Don't you dare take it out on her. She's just trying to protect me. Like you should be doing. But you don't. You don't try to protect me. You just hurt me.

I don't know why I pushed so hard for this relationship. The only thing it's brought me is pain.

I hate you. I really do. It's not that I want to hate you. I really do hate you.

You're a bitch. You're a drama queen. You're melodramatic like no other. You wanna make drama. I can't take it anymore. I can't. I'm not gonna put up with your crap anymore. You're an idiot. If I don't talk to you, you know why.

Sometimes I wish you would read these, that way I wouldn't have to explain things to you. But of course, you don't.
-Ebony