Love, Drugs, and High School

Chapter Eighteen

          My whole body was shaking. It was just way too much to take in. Is it possible to cope knowing that your boyfriend killed Emmett. It was just too much for me to take in.

          The pain in my chest seemed to be unbearable. It wouldn’t go away; just lingered, being a constant reminder of how much I lost. I had lost my childhood best friend, Emmett, forever.

          Thinking back to when I was a kid, I remembered planning my marriage with Emmett. One summer, when we were five, both of our parents were invited to a wedding. Emmett had asked me to go as his date, but later at the wedding, he asked me to marry him.

          During the reception of the wedding, Emmett and I danced and danced until we couldn’t any longer. Both of us had bright smiles on our faces that lit up the whole room. Over to the side, our parents were gushing about how cute we were. We danced the night away, two short little kids amongst a crowd of adults, but that night I felt like I ruled the world.

          The last dance that we danced together was slow song. We copied what the couples around us were doing, and at the end of the song, Emmett kissed me on the cheek. My cheeks turned bright red and I ran away to my mom screaming.

          It was me in my beautiful pink dress and Emmett’s handsome black tux. I would never forget that night. He would always tease me about it. Joke around that we were actually married. We were at the mall walking the one time and he darted away, and when I turned around, I couldn’t find him. He had gone off into Claire’s and bought me a big fake diamond ring.

          He slipped it on my finger and I had worn it ever since the crash. It was too much of a reminder to keep wearing afterwards.

          Tears were now streaming down my face rapidly. I couldn’t take this pain anymore. It was bad enough having to cope with Emmett’s death, but knowing that my boyfriend, the one who comforted me, was the one who killed him was too much to handle.

          Realizing that I was still standing in the hallway, I ran to the bathroom. Thankfully the hallways were empty. I hadn’t even heard the bell ring. The only thing I could focus on was Ryan and how he had walked away from me and how he had killed Emmett.

          I clicked the lock shut in the bathroom stall and wiped my nose, trying to calm myself down enough to speak. My uncle had just dropped me off at school, insisting that he could take me home if I wanted to. He told me I didn’t have to go, but I insisted.

          Now, I regretted my decision. I could barely keep my hands steady to call my uncle. When he answered I barely made out that I needed him to pick me up; that I wanted to go home. He said he understood and that he would be right there, so I just stayed in the bathroom and cried.

          He sent me a text when he was there and I left. People in the hallway asked me if I was ok, but I hardly heard them. Walking through the halls, everything was a blur except the front doors that got me out of this prison.

          “Sweetheart,” an old lady’s voice said. It brought me back to reality for just a second. “You are dismissed.” After a short pause she added, “Are you ok? Did something happen?”

          How do you explain to someone who doesn’t care that your life is basically shit at the moment and you don’t want to talk about it? “No, I’m fine.” I tried to say it in a sweeter voice, but I’m not sure it came out that way.

          “Well if you need anything you can talk to me.” She turned her head and looked around; making sure no one was around and then lowered her voice. “If you want to talk, come and talk to me. Don’t go talk to those buzzards we call guidance counselors. They wouldn’t know a crying child from a happy one.” She rubbed my arm sympathetically but other than that she showed no sympathy—something I really appreciated.

          Walking out to the car, I tried to hide my face and wipe my nose and pretend that nothing was wrong. Standing up straight, there was nothing that I could do to change everything that was happening. Everyone has to adapt and cope. That’s exactly what I was doing.

          “Let’s get you home,” my Uncle said quietly. There was no reason to ask how I was. There was no reason to say I told you that you shouldn’t have gone there. I accomplished something that needed to be done. If I didn’t at least get to see Ryan, I would feel even worse than I do now. And trust me that is already pretty shitty.

          “I’m sorry I disturbed you at work,” my voice was monotone, like a robot.

          “Annabelle, I’m sorry I showed you that. I shouldn’t have. Look at what it’s doing to you!” My uncle hit his hands hard on the steering wheel, taking out his frustration.

          “I wanted you to show me. I needed to know the truth. It’s about time that everything makes sense and that I don’t feel like a murder.” The emotion in my voice was gone. “Thanks for the ride.”  I said as I got out and shut the door before my uncle could refute anything.

          Sitting myself on my bed and locking the door I couldn’t help but think. I thought mostly of what Ryan and Emmett, but a small part of me couldn’t help but wonder: “Maybe horrible things happen so that good things can take their place.

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A/N

Hope this clears last chapter up a little bit! But yes, Emmett swerved to avoid Ryan. So updates are going to be coming like once every month because I'm super busy so I really hope that it doesn't turn anyone away but I'm going to be trying to update sooner than that but I just don't think that it's going to happen so at the bare minimum it's going to be once a month! Oh and hopefully you enjoy the chapters! I really want to thank all of my readers for reading I really love all of you!

This is dedicated to @courtney1824 for leaving an awesome comment that really made me smile! I hope that you liked this chapter and I hope that you keep reading! :)