Everything Changes (Kavi)

Chicago, Il (1)

I'm attempting to write around 3 chapters in one sitting right now to hopefully give me a kick to make me update more...we will see how well this goes (probably not very well)! Hopefully I'll begin to update every week...hopefully.

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Seth: Sorry babe, can't make it to Chicago after all. Work is keeping me really busy that I can't afford to leave. I'll make it up to you though, I promise :) Love you xxxx

She was looking forward to his visit, hoping that seeing him again would finally settle he mind over Avi once and for good but it appeared like that would not happen for a long time. Kirstie wanted to scream out of frustration, she considered throwing her phone against her hotel wall and watching it shatter into a million pieces just like her relationship slowly was but she couldn't, she still cared. Part of her wished she had the guts to end it with him, to finally give her neglecting boyfriend a piece of her mind but every time she attempted to, she failed miserably. What they had was too valuable to loose, if it wasn't she would have responded to Avi's recent proclamation with less negativity.

One moment she couldn't stop blushing about what he had said to her, day dreaming about what the future could bring for them, and then the next she would be angry at him and cursing him for making her mind unsettled. Truth was, Kirstie wasn't sure what she felt but what she did know was that she wasn't feeling like she was supposed to. Just months earlier she would have felt incredibly awkward about the whole situation and would have probably told Seth about the whole incident but things had changed now, it was more complicated than that.

She wanted him, desperately. Whether it was love or not she could not tell but it certainly was lust, and she certainly couldn't shake him from her mind. His kisses, his touch, his presence - she wanted it all but she shouldn't have it, she couldn't have it. Each time Seth pushed her away she moved closer towards Avi and that wasn't right, if it was going to happen it should happen naturally, not as a reaction to her current relationship. It wasn't fair of her to take advantage of him yet she still wanted to and it wasn't like he wasn't offering. She needed him, she needed Avi.

To take her mind away from the whole Seth situation, Kirstie called Genevieve over to stop herself from storming over to Avi's room to receive another kind of distraction. She was the closest thing she had to a friend on tour, joining them after their whole band dynamic changed due to Seth so she wasn't harmed by Kirstie pushing her away. She had never experienced what it was like before and that was precisely why Kirstie liked her so much - she was a new person, someone who didn't remind her of the past, someone to be excited over the future with.

Kirstie was relieved to hear her friends gentle knock from the other side of the door and scurried over to it quickly to meet her.

"Are you okay?" Genevieve asked the second Kirstie opened the door to her room. The show wasn't for a few hours so when she had gotten the call to come over to do her make up early, she sensed something was wrong.

"Not really, Seth can't come for the next few days after all." Kirstie murmured bitterly as she lead Genevieve into the room and the make up artist immediately begun setting up her station.

"Ouch. Work again?"

"Yep. I'm beginning to think he should just be in a relationship with that instead."

"Don't say that." She cautioned her yet Kirstie sensed she didn't really mean it, she only had to say it because she was her friend but she probably hated Seth just like everyone else.

"It's true! He's never around." Kirstie threw her hands up as much as she could in protest without disturbing Genevieve as she began work on her makeup.