Arcadian Huntress ⚢

Chapter XIII Banished

Also, I began craving foods and became more hormonal. I ate more than I should and my bladder seems to be always full.

It took me just a few months for me to find discomfort with my sister huntresses. At first, their hands on my skin had me cringing during our baths. Soon enough, though, I mastered the art of pretense. Life continued as it always had. Nightmares plagued me all night, but during the day, no one was any wiser to my shame. I kept my distance from the Goddess lest she learned the truth of my feeling for her and what it had cost me.

I began to experiment with herbs in order to find the right one that would solve my problems. I needed to get rid of this babe growing inside me before it started to become noticeable. I failed every time. Without the knowledge of a healer, I wil never find the right herb or prepare it the right way. Parthenos was the only healer I trusted, but now I felt her absence as a heavy weight more than ever.

A few months became half a year. With the changing of the seasons, I was feeling hope again. If Persephone could start her life anew every six months, then so could I. That hope came crashing down the afternoon I spent too long soaking in the well of cool spring water.

Lately, my body had felt different, achy and heavy. Floating in the water was the only time I felt better. The other nymphs had already cantered off into the woods to spend the day with the young fawns and fox kits. Lady Artemis had gone off hunting boar in the early morning. I was alone.

At least I thought I was. But I knew I was pregnant. It was horrible. Would it be a sin if I abort a God's child? Sure it would be. He would kill me. But if I let the child live, Hera will kill me. I am doomed either way, with no protection from others.

I could not help but think of Parthenos and asked her for strength whenever I stare at her constellation in the night sky. Was there a prophecy foretold that a huntress of Artemis would be raped by the Goddess' father? Though I always confide in her, I knew that Parthenos cannot help me. She was powerless, her spirits can only roam in the skies.

Then I suddenly remembered that Lady Artemis said years ago. That facing one's fate was nobler than running away from it. With a huff of breath, I steeled myself. I can face this. I can do this. I just have to take my revenge upon the Fates for weaving this fate. But then, I remembered that the Fates were also Zeus' children and sisters of Lady Artemis.

It was a twisted family tree.

Months had passed, and I still had tried to hide my pregnancy away from my Goddess. I could not work up the courage to tell my lady that I had been raped by her father. It would be embarrassing and shameful to tell her, and I would be banished from her sight. It pained me that I would no longer be able to see her anymore if she discovered I was no longer a virgin. Her respect for me would be lost for eternity.

I know I have thought of these problems of mine over and over again, but there was no other viable option for me to forgive and forget. There was no other thought that plagued my mind other than my love and fear for my Goddess and the anger I felt for whoever was watching me from the start, amused at my own predicaments.

I do not want to leave her. I will have to hide this as long as I can. Thoughts of having an abortion once more wafted through my thoughts, but then another wave of thought would always stop me. As if the child was not meant to be aborted. The unborn child was a demigod like Parthenos. If demigods have it worst with Gods as their parents, their mortal parents should not treat them like mere collaterals. The child was still small inside me, there are no maternal feelings developed within me as of now, but I also remembered myself. My own childhood sticking to the back of my mind like a stuck kitten up a trees. I was a child, born without a cause, and somehow, I did not want to let other children feel the same thing I did.