The Queen and the Rose

Chapter 15

How do you all feel about an AU for my next full-length story, to shake things up?

The Doctor closed his eyes.  He'd always (whether he wanted to admit it or not) wanted to hear such words from Rose.  He wanted her to love him, because he was an incredibly selfish man, but he knew she shouldn't.  

"I don't know why you've got hangups," she continued, "And if you want to pull away from me that's fine.  But the point it we still have to get out of this together."

"I know, Rose," he said, and was surprised at how weak his voice sounded.  He wouldn't have it any other way.  He was only leaving here with her.  How they planned to escape though, he had no idea.  

"We travel together," she stated, "You mentioned that.  You're going to take me back home after this, aren't you?"

He felt his throat constrict at her words.  Did she really think that he didn't want her?  After all of this?  He closed his eyes, giving himself a moment, then turned to look at her. 

"Only if you want me to.  And you'll be able to decide once you get your memory back."

"If I get my memory back."

"You will," he said fiercely, "I promise."

She still wasn't looking at him.  "You shouldn't make promises like that, Doctor."

"I try to only make promises I can keep," he shot back, "And right now my promise is to keep you safe and get us out of here, your memory intact."

"You can't promise that," she replied.  She turned her head away from him, looking out the slit in the curtain on the litter.  "I think it's best that we don't talk, now."

He heard the strangled quality to her voice and could tell that she was trying not to cry.  God, what had he done?  She'd only wanted to be close to him, and of course he wanted to be close to her.  He fidgeted with his hands in his lap, resisting the urge to reach out and grab her hand again.  It was nearly painful to not do so.  

The silence weighed on them until they reached the city.  The Doctor and Rose were followed by a guard who had given them a pouch of money for the fabric the Queen would need.  He kept looking at her, but she wouldn't return his gaze.

He knew it wasn't out of anger at him, that she was just trying to repress herself so she wouldn't make him uncomfortable.  In fact, she was making him the very opposite of uncomfortable and that there was the very problem in the situation. 

"You're probably better with fabric than me," he said conversationally, bumping her shoulder with his.  "Care to help out?" 

She nodded.  "Yeah, no light purples, only deep, because that means more dye is used.  Makes it more valuable."

The Doctor wasn't about to tell her that he already knew that.  She needed something to grasp onto, and if that happened to be knowledge of fabrics, so be it. 

He didn't want to hurt her.  She'd thank him later for pushing her away, she'd probably think she'd embarrassed herself.  He was reluctant to admit that he had wanted to do more than just kiss her.  He'd never tell her, and somehow, they would have to leave all of this and what had happened in the past.  

It would be harder than he could ever imagine, he was sure.

Rose easily navigated them through the market, at least part of her remembering that they were always dodging aliens and their artifacts on different planets.  She looked back every once in awhile to make sure he was following her, and every time she looked, his eyes were firmly locked on her.  She tried not to read into it.