For Him - Shawn Mendes

MY way of loving you

SHAWN
5th of May, 2016

S: Hold still.

H: Shawn, put my camera down.

S: But your eyes look like copper against honey, or like, maple syrup or something today. I think they're my favourite thing about you. They're gorgeous.

H: That was poetic.

S: Don't laugh at me, it's true.

H: Shawn, please put it back in the hotel room.

S: You don't believe me, do you?

H: Shawn...

S: Look at your eyes in your reflection of the elevator door.

H: All I see are two brown dots.

S: Brown dots?

H: Yeah, kinda like dirt.

S: Well I love them.

SHAWN

17th of May, 2016

She places a short, timid kiss on my bottom lip and a smile, small and shy but there nonetheless spreads across her face. "I'll be back after lunch," She murmurs, pulling nervously at the end of her hem, "the meeting should be quick. What time's the show?"

"I like your hair like that," I say absentmindedly, because I notice the way she's adjusting to my compliments. I notice the way she smiles, but instead of hiding behind her hands like she always used to, she pulls me closer to her and thanks me. I notice it and it drives me crazy.

"Shawn?" She laughs, "Anyone home?"

I shake my head and gaze down at her, my eyes widening at her firetruck red dress. She looks older; and I realise we both do. "Yeah, sorry. The show's at 6. Where are you going? Why are you so dressed up?"

Hannah hums and runs a hand through my fringe. "A secret, but you'll find out soon."

"For me?" I ask, confused.

She nods once. "Yes, for you. From me to you."

"Why?" I ask, dumbfounded. My birthday isn't until August and nothing significant has happened recently. I wonder what causes for a surprise.

Hannah grabs her bag from the table beside the window, stained with frost and rain and flakes of snow from last night. Outside the Finnish air is cold and heavy. I pass her the jacket on the end of her hotel bed, waiting for her to reply.

She looks so happy, so content and well slept and pretty that I have to kiss her again, softly where her jaw meets her neck. "Because I love you," she says easily before pausing, "and because it's about time I started writing again."

SHAWN

18th of May, 2016

When you wake up, your whole world's flipped. It's just different and you gotta go with it. That's just simply growing up.

And to not see it in a negative way, you have to see it as it's been given to you. I mean, as much as times can be crazy, you're gonna feel like that's where you're supposed to be. You're not gonna feel out of place anymore, you're gonna feel like that's where you're meant to be.

You don't have to pretend that it's easy all the time. You just let it go, and grow with it. You can't hold on to the old you, or the old this, or the old that, because you know you change.

And it's not changing in a bad way, it's just changing. Because that's what happens in life. You grow up; everyone moves on, you're just learning. You stay true to yourself.